Company Name Comic Strips - Page 6

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1000 Results for Company Name

View 51 - 60 results for company name comic strips. Discover the best "Company Name" comics from Dilbert.com.

Toxic Employee Was Right

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Toxic Employee Was Right - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #employees, #fire, #managers & supervisors

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boss: does anyone have any suggestions for improving our company culture? dilbert: for starters, you could fire the toxic employee you hired for no good reason. boss whispers to toxic employee: you were right about dilbert being a hater. toxic employee: you should hear what he says about you.

Thanking Everyone By Name

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Thanking Everyone By Name - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #name

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boss: i'd like to thank each member of the team by name...i'll start with what's-his-face here. voice from crowd: it's dilbert. boss: no, that's not it. you look like steve.

Layoff Package

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Layoff Package - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #fire, #office, #office workers, #buyout

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dilbert, the boss and wally at conference room table. the boss: the company is announcing generous buyout packages for employees who elect to leave. dilbert: won't all the smart people leave first because they can easily get new jobs at higher pay? the boss: ummm... dilbert: if you don't get enough volunteers, will you start firing people? the boss: we have no plan to do that. dilbert: will you make a plan if too few people leave? the boss: oh, yes. dilbert: would it be fair to say the people who stay will envy the dead? the boss: um... one week later: the boss: how many took the offer? carol: it's just you now.

Lawyer Can't Be Too Careful

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Lawyer Can't Be Too Careful - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #lawyers, #office, #agreement, #legalese

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company lawyer: i made seven hundred suggested changes to the agreement. dilbert: you have turned a good income opportunity into a flaming cesspool of impenetrable legalese. company lawyer: you can't be too careful. dilbert: i think you just proved we can.

Why Are Other Companies Not Doing It

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Why Are Other Companies Not Doing It - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #company, #variables

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the boss to dilbert: if your idea is so good, why aren't other companies doing it? dilbert: because they are in completely different businesses with completely different variables and they don't have a genius like me working for them. the boss: what happens if we try your idea but we do it wrong? dilbert: that's called "business as usual."

And Then Mark Said

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And Then Mark Said - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #business, #office, #office workers, #relationships

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tina: ...and then mark said... dilbert: stop talking about mark! dilbert is visually angry. dilbert: all you do is talk about mark! i am so sick of mark. please talk about anything but mark. dilbert is still visually angry. tina: someone told me you'd say that. dilbert: was his name -- MARK? dilbert angry.

Offensive Product Name

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Offensive Product Name - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #insults, #office, #office workers, #elbonian

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dilbert: our product name turns out to be offensive in the elbonian language. dilbert: it means "one who rips off his own facial hair and feeds it to a baby bird, which chokes and dies, signaling years of drought." the boss: that's all in one word? dilbert: they only have seventeen words, and nine of them are insults.

Press Release

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Press Release - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #boss, #unethical, #scientists, #press, #question, #overkill

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Dilbert: The unethical scientist we hired to support our product claims started today. Boss: Write a press release that says whatever we want him to say and put his name on it. Dilbert: Should we show it to him? Boss: That feels like overkill.

My Last Company

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My Last Company - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #criticism, #employees, #employment, #office, #office workers

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Man: That's not the way we did it at my last company. Dilbert: Now I hate you and I don't want to interact with you in any way in the future. Man: Okay, that sounds just like my last company.

Take The Stairs

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Take The Stairs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #birthdays, #encouragement, #exercise & fitness, #health, #office, #office workers, #company, #life insurance

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Boss: The company encourages you to take the stairs instead of the elevator because it is good for your health. Ted: I take the elevator because my life insurance doesn't pay off if I kill myself all at once. Boss: On another topic, we will celebrate birthdays this month with cake in the break room. Ted: Perfect.