Dating Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

150 Results for Dating

View 51 - 60 results for dating comic strips. Discover the best "Dating" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags efficiency experts, medicines, more motivated, competetive, safe and natural, side effects, psychopathy, improved dating life, needle, injection

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I found a quick way to make you more motivated and competitive. I know it's safe because it's all natural. The only known side effects are psychopathy and an improved dating life.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, time travel, date cyborgs, time travelrs, from future, less flattering guess, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: I don't date cyborgs. Dilbert: I'm not a cyborg. Yet. Woman: I don't date time travelers from the future. Dilbert; I'm not a time traveler. Woman: My third guess is less flattering. Dilbert: I'm a time traveler.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, engineers, engineer, excellent employment, potential, social skills, relationships, engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Hi. I'm an engineer. That means I have excellent employment potential and I can fix things around the house. Woman: How are your social skills? Dilbert: Wow. Look who wants the moon.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, internet & world wide web, social media cosultant, one like, less than ten thousand, insulting, elbonian, inflate your like count, socialize, wine glasses, bar wine, kiss, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: What do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a social media consultant. Dilbert: I like you. Woman: Phhht. You're giving me one like? Anything less than ten thousand likes is an insult. Dilbert: I'll be right back. I hired an Elbonian to artificially inflate your like count. Elbonian: Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like. Dilbert: I am not paying that guy.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bad treatment, dating, honesty, low self esteem, mental health, mixed signals, therapist, relationships, psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: My therapist says I have low self-esteem. Dilbert: I like where this is heading. Woman: I'm drawn to guys who treat me poorly. Dilbert: You sound crazy. Woman: Jerk. Dilbert: In my defense, you send mixed signals.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, frustration, relations between the sexes, modern world, purpose of men, money, bad jokes, faltulence, useless men, pondering on importance, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: I'm not sure what function men serve in the modern world. My job pays well, so I have all the money I need. If something in my house breaks, I either fix it or pay someone to fix it. If I want a baby, I'll call a fertility doctor. In today's world, men are little more than carriers of bad jokes and flatulence. My gardener mows my lawn. Dilbert: I get it!!! Dogbert: That is disturbing. Dilbert: Not compared to the alternatives.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, organic parts, cyborg technology, robot, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dating in 2018 Woman: Your organic parts are unimpressive. But, wow, your cyborg technology is scorching hot. Dilbert: I knew my day would come. Woman: I want to make a robot with you.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags coffee & tea, double coffee, success, work ethic, passion, necessary

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I'm double-mugging because I heard that passion is necessary for success. By 4pm I'll be so passionate I'll be dating my chair. Catbert: Nothing about that sounded right.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, mobile (cell) phones, humiliation, disrespect, company, relationships, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Do you mind if i check something on my phone? Woman: Why would I mind the humiliation and disrespect of being with a man who prefers the company of his phone? Dilbert: That's the sort of attitude that makes you finish second to my phone.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, engineers, framework, allow construction, large scale analytical queries, unstructured data, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: So, what do you do for a living? Dilbert: I'm working on a framework to allow construction of large-scale analytical queries on unstructured data. Woman: I'm a little turned on by that. Dilbert: Settle down. It's just a framework.