Force Problems Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

244 Results for Force Problems

View 51 - 60 results for force problems comic strips. Discover the best "Force Problems" comics from Dilbert.com.

Solving Problems In Interviews

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Solving Problems In Interviews - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags interview, trick, thinking, problem

View Transcript

Transcript

Job Interview. Boss: Tell me your process for solving this sort of problem. Man: I would ignore it for a week and likely discover that it wasn't important in the first place. If it still matters after a week, I would hold fake job interviews and ask people how to solve it. Boss: Apparently, that doesn't work.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ideas, problems, talking, solution, obliviousness, criticism, honesty

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Why didn't you tell me our biggest vendor pulled out of the deal? Dilbert: If I told you my problems, you would suggest solutions. Your solutions generally don't make sense. But you are my boss, so I would be obliged to waste time looking into your suggestions. So if you try to solve my problem, I will have two problems instead of one. Boss: Sometimes my ideas are good! Right? Dilbert: That is a dangerous way to think.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags wifi, wi-fi, internet, coffee shop, public, privacy, security, technology, cyber security, password, identity, identity theft, passwords

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Yay, you have wi-fi! Now I can drink overpriced coffee while strangers steal my passwords. The timing is sort of a coincidence. Because I was just wondering what would be the fastest way to lose everything I own. And this fixes one of my other big problems too... I always want to share my browser history with strangers, and now I can! By the way, I'm Dilbert. Elbonian: I was Gropnorb, but now I go by Fred. Dilbert: Did a guy named Fred use your wi-fi? Elbonian: Right after he under-tipped.

List Of Known Problems

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
List Of Known Problems - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags joke, insult, misanthrope, misanthropy

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Did you get the link I sent you for our company directory? Boss: I didn't ask for that. I asked for a list of known problem... Oh. Not funny. Alice: Then how do you explain this?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deadlines, deadline, management, time management, projects, distraction, multitasking

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: When do you think you can get that done for me? Dilbert: Depends. If I had no interruptions, I could finish in four hours. But we have to factor in the inefficiency of your management. For example, you're likely to give me six new projects before I get started on this one. And you force me to work in ta noisy office surrounded by all the people I need to avoid to get work done. Given all of that, I'd say it will take seven months. Boss: I'll give you three months because I'm a leader. Dilbert: Oookay. And... how much of the three months will involve you standing there?

Root Cause Is People

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Root Cause Is People - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags problems, cause and effect, human error

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I found the root cause of our problems. It's people. They're buggy. Boss: Did you bring a pen?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deception, job, laziness, strategic thinker, strategy, work ethic, worker bee, attend meetings, strategic, no work, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Can I create my own job? I hear people do that. They figure out what they are good at and then they create a job around it. I'm more of a strategic thinker than a worker bee. My job could be to attend meetings and say strategic things. And, of course, I would have no time to respond to email because I'd be busy being strategic. Boss: It feels as if you want a job that doesn't involve work. Wally: Would you trust a strategic thinker who can't solve his own problems?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags anger, criticism, perfection, psychological disorder, psychological evaluation, perfectionist, warning, not a problem, cognitive dissonance, unrealistic optimism, projection bias, jerk, anger issues

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: I should warn you that I'm a perfectionist. Dilbert: I appreciate the warning. Do you have any other psychological problems or just the one? Coworker: I don't think of it as a "problem." Dilbert: I guess that's what makes it so bad. I see a lot of other psychological problems in your writing. Cognitive dissonance, unrealistic optimism, and some projection bias. But I can see why you think your perfectionism is the worst part. Coworker: You're a jerk. Dilbert: ...and here come the anger issues.

I Need Solutions Not Unexpected Problems

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
I Need Solutions Not Unexpected Problems - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags authority, convincing, managers, managers & supervisors, launch deadline, solutions, unexpected problems, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Are you going to meet the launch deadline? Dilbert: No. There were unexpected problems. Boss: I need solutions, not unexpected problems! Did that mean anything? Dilbert: Almost. Good try.

Boss Transfers Problem To Someone Else

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Transfers Problem To Someone Else - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, bad advice, problem, problems, snag, prodcuts, accept failure, lie, transfer problem, father, old sayings, Family

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert:I'm hitting a snag with this RFP because our products don't do what they need. Should I give up and accept failure or lie about our features and transfer the problem to them? Boss: My daddy used to say it isn't a problem if you can give it to someone else. Dilbert: Then he drove you to school?