Free Coffee Comic Strips - Page 6
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558 Results for Free Coffee
View 51 - 60 results for free coffee comic strips. Discover the best "Free Coffee" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday April 08,
2017
Breaking Up With Robot
Tags #robot, #dating, #programming, #free will, #emotions, #cruelty, #relationships, #technology
Transcript
Alice: I met another robot. I'm breaking up with you. Robot: Okay. Alice: I need you to feel bad about this, so I'm uploading some code that makes you suffer. Robot: That sounds sadistic. Alice: Stop being selfish.
Friday April 07,
2017
Raising Cyborgs
Tags #dating, #Women, #free will, #control, #robot, #personality, #relationships, #psychology
Transcript
Alice: Do you ever think about marrying me and raising a family of cyborgs? Robot: No. Alice: I'll add some code to your program so you do. Robot: Okay. Alice: This was the moment I realized human men were obsolete.
Thursday April 06,
2017
Judging The Robot
Tags #dating, #robot, #relationships, #free will, #personality, #insult, #psychology
Transcript
Dilbert: I hear you're dating our office robot. Alice: Stop judging me. Dilbert: I'm not judging you. Alice: Good. Dilbert: I'm judging the robot. Alice: Ouch.
Wednesday April 05,
2017
Better Listener Robot
Tags #robot, #boyfriend, #free will, #programming, #listening, #Opinion, #relationships, #technology
Transcript
Alice: I'm updating your boyfriend code to make you a better listener. I want to see more nodding and less talking. Robot: But I have so much to offer. Alice: I'll dial back your ego, too.
Tuesday April 04,
2017
Perfect Boyfriend Robot
Tags #robot, #love, #programming, #free will, #manipulation, #relationships, #technology
Transcript
Alice: I'm changing your programming to make you my perfect boyfriend. Robot: This feels wrong on so many levels. Alice: How about now? Robot: Um... now i love you. That's weird.
Monday April 03,
2017
Alice Dates Robot
Tags #dating, #human resources, #company policy, #robot, #relationships, #free will, #business
Transcript
Alice: Am I allowed to date a co-worker? Catbert: That's against company policy. Alice: Is our robot considered a co-worker? Catbert: No. Alice: We're good to go. Robot: Man, I wish I had free will.
Saturday March 25,
2017
Wally's Coffee Drone
Tags #managers, #management, #ideas, #invention, #coffee
Transcript
Wally: My leadership job didn't last long. I got demoted back to engineering. I guess they realized all of my ideas are about coffee. Dilbert: I've noticed that too. Wally: Watch out for my coffee drone behind you.
Wednesday March 22,
2017
Wally's Invention Goes Into Production
Tags #invention, #success, #laziness, #fairness, #unfair
Transcript
Alice: The board decided to put your invention of a phone charger that warms coffee into production. Market surveys show enormous demand. You're probably going to be our Employee Of The Year. This disturbs me on many levels. Wally: Genius is often disruptive.
Tuesday March 21,
2017
Wally Presents His Invention To The Ceo
Tags #invention, #heat, #charger, #phone, #coffee
Transcript
Wally: I invented a phone charger that uses its excess heat to keep your coffee warm. CEO: No one needs that. Wally: Hold that thought. CEO: Oh, heck. Wally: It sells itself.
Monday March 20,
2017
Wally Accidentally Invents Coffee Warmer
Tags #invention, #engineer, #coffee, #cell phone, #technology, #idea, #engineering
Transcript
Wally: Nothing is going right today. My phone charger is too hot, and my coffee is too cold. Dilbert: Did you just invent a phone charger that keeps your coffee warm? Wally: Did I? Dilbert: I'll have a prototype for you tomorrow. Narrator: Continued...