Ideas Comic Strips - Page 6

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143 Results for Ideas

View 51 - 60 results for ideas comic strips. Discover the best "Ideas" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags thinking, ideas, sock at, steal ideas, double workload, employee, boss, professional realtionships

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Dilbert: I have a great idea? Boss: What kind? Is it the kind I scoff at, the kind I steal, or the kind that makes me double your workload? Dilbert: It might be all of those. Boss: Sounds good so far.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags obliviousness, thinking, judge them, chipmunk, judge algebra, complex and useful, innovative circuit design, engineer, office setting, desks, computers, engineering

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Boss: Do you have any great ideas? Dilbert: How would I know? Boss: You could tell me your ideas and I'll judge them Dilbert: That's like asking a chipmunk to judge algebra. Boss: Are you comparing me to algebra? Dilbert: Sure, let's go with that. Boss: That makes sense because algebra is complex and useful... just like me. Dilbert: So... what do you think of this innovative circuit design? Boss: It's um... fine? Dilbert: Said the chipmunk to the engineer.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags frustration, negative, good communicator, terrible ideas, be more positive, fixed now, good job, leadership

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Boss: You're being too negative lately. Dilbert: Am I negative or am I a good communicator surrounded by terrible ideas. Boss: Just try to be more positive! Dilbert: Okay, I'm all fixed now. Good job on the leadership.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bossify, deception, fund ideas, genius, ideas, customer support, software, budget approval, delay projects, low priority, wise, funding, engineering

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Dilbert: You had a great idea bout upgrading our customer support software. Boss: I don't remember having that idea. Dilbert: It was genius. Boss: Well, that does sound like something I would suggest. Dilbert: We'll need budget approval, but that should be no problem for you. Boss: Duh. Obviously I'll fund my idea. It's genius. Dilbert: I'll need to delay my other project, but, as you said, those are lower priorities. Boss: I said that? Dilbert: It was very wise of you. Alice: How did you get funding for your idea? Dilbert: I had to bossify it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags electronic mail, thinking, lack of creativity, choke yourself, creating ideas

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Boss: I traced all of our problems back to your lack of creativity. You should be creating ideas that change the course of civilization, but instead, you sit there like a lump. Dilbert: I'm sending you a link that describes fun ways to choke yourself.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags obstinacy, public speaking, thinking, vet ideas, peers, hate ideas

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Dilbert: I've been asked to vet my idea with my peers. To save time, I am willing to stipulate that you hate all ideas that are not your own. All in favor? Alice: I hate this idea, too.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags competition (psychology), thinking, ceos technology challenge, innovative ideas, fresh water, elbonia, award winning ideas, water in a box

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CEO: I'm proud to announce the winner in the CEO's technology challenge. Two weeks ago, I challenged you to come up with innovative ideas for getting fresh water to Elbonia. The winner is someone named Wally. Wally's idea for bringing fresh water to Elbonia is... "in a box." That's the best one? Boss: We only had one entry. CEO: I hate your bald guts. Wally: I get that a lot. If you need me, I'll be in my cubicle thinking up award-winning ideas.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags inventions, meat, thinking, write ideas, brainstorming, lunch meat, robot, human, confuisng

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Boss: Tina, I asked you to write up the best ideas from our brainstorming session. The top one on your list is "A Robot Made of Lunch Meat." That's basically just a human. Tina: What part of "Best Ideas" is confusing you?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags thinking, eureka program, best ideas, dry hole, dude ranch

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Boss: We are introducing our "Eureka Program" to recognize that the best ideas come from employees. Wally: I have ideas? Boss: Well, that was a dry hole. Wally: Can I turn my cubicle into a dude ranch?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags anger, honesty, corporate culture, micromanaging, higgs - boson, taboo, new culture

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Boss: I'm looking for ideas on how we can improve our corporate culture. Alice: You could start by being less of a micromanaging d-bag who hides like a Higgs-boson whenever we need a decision. Boss: That didn't help. Alice: Will honesty still be taboo in the new culture?