Nothing To Fear Comic Strips - Page 6
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Character
463 Results for Nothing To Fear
View 51 - 60 results for nothing to fear comic strips. Discover the best "Nothing To Fear" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday September 07,
2017
Robot Will Crush Employees
Tags #robot, #boss, #manager, #threat, #artificial intelligence, #control, #power
Transcript
Robot: Thanks to advances in artificial intelligence, I am both a robot and your new boss. Work hard while I do nothing or I will crush each of your skulls with my mechanical arms. Dilbert: He's tough, but he's fair. Wally: And no micromanaging. I find it refreshing.
Wednesday September 06,
2017
Robot Is Too Smart
Tags #robot, #automation, #power, #managers, #intelligence, #ai, #artificial intelligence
Transcript
Boss: Our new robot is too smart. It keeps threatening humans into doing its job while it does nothing but drink coffee. CEO: Isn't that all you do? Boss: I don't like where this is heading.
Monday September 04,
2017
A Wally Robot
Tags #robot, #modernity, #technology, #automation, #coffee
Transcript
Asok: Do you worry that a robot will someday take your job? Wally: Nah. No one will build a robot that does nothing but drink coffee. Man: It does nothing but drink coffee. It can replace twenty percent of your workforce. Boss: I like it.
Saturday August 26,
2017
Product Warning Is Too Long
Tags #technical writer, #instructions, #caution, #warning, #safety, #criticism
Transcript
Tina: My boss, who knows nothing about technical writing, told me to cut my 700-page product warning down to 500 pages. He doesn't appreciate my art. Dilbert: Sounds like both of you are idiots. Tina: This will go smoother if you stop talking.
Wednesday August 23,
2017
Gain Weight Using Product
Tags #warning, #caution, #labeleing, #weight, #safety, #medical
Transcript
Tina: Did I leave out any risks on the product warning page? Boss: I don't see anything about the risk of overeating while owning the product. Tina: Our product has nothing to do with eating. Boss: Then why did I gain weight when I used it?
Thursday August 03,
2017
Dilbert Does Nothing Useful
Tags #work ethic, #meaning, #meaningless, #motivation, #laziness
Transcript
Dilbert: All I did today was create a bunch of PowerPoint slides that no one will understand. But I got paid the same as if I had done something useful. Is this the first stage of becoming you? Wally: If you're lucky.
Wednesday August 02,
2017
Nothing Dilbert Does Matters
Tags #motivation, #accomplishment, #meaning, #meaningless
Transcript
Dilbert: I completed my assignment, and yet I feel no sense of accomplishment. Could it be because nothing I do makes any difference in the world? Boss: I was going to tell you that, but I didn't want to demotivate you.
Thursday July 20,
2017
Adding A Feature
Tags #technology, #design, #changes, #planning, #managers
Transcript
Boss: Add this feature to the software. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! Why didn't you ask for this weeks ago when it would have been easy???? Boss: This is nothing. Wait until you see the feature I ask for next week.
Sunday July 02,
2017
Tags #cpr, #bragging, #braggart, #ego, #one-up, #storytelling, #exaggeration
Transcript
Dilbert: My CPR instructor says I was one of his best students. Topper: That's nothing. I'm so good at CPR that my practice dummy came to life. He grew limbs and got married to a crash test dummy. They had three mannequins together and they live in the suburbs. But the marriage didn't last because the CPR dummy could not forget the taste of my lips. I blame myself for being irresistible. Why do all of my conversations end with me sitting alone?
Wednesday June 21,
2017
Dogbert The Special Counsel
Tags #trump, #comey, #obstruction, #russia, #collusion
Transcript
Boss: Everyone says you've been colluding with our Elbonian competitors. I've assigned a special counsel to review all of your email and phone logs. Dilbert: I've done nothing wrong. Dogbert: Stop trying to obstruct justice.