Order For Me Comic Strips - Page 6

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View 51 - 60 results for order for me comic strips. Discover the best "Order For Me" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 01, 2002's comic on:


Tags #procurement, #special cable, #rope, #exclusive contract, #rope distributer, #monkey, #cheaper, #desk, #animals

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Headline: Procurement. Dilbert says to a monkey, "I need to order a special cable for my computer." The monkey holds up a rope and says, "Ooh hoo hoo hoo!" Dilbert responds, "No. That's a piece of rope. Yes, I know it's cheaper." Dilbert continues, "Well, maybe it was a mistake to sign an exclusive contract with a rope distributor." The monkey crosses its arms and replies, "Ooh hoo hoo jerk."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 02, 2002's comic on:


Tags #daring commando raid, #internet provider, #cancel, #phone or email, #service agreement, #stun gun, #overused joke

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Dilbert is dressed in all purple, carrying a rope over his shoulder. He says to Dogbert, "Would you like to join me on a daring commando raid?" Dogbert replies, "Sure." Dilbert says, "Do you want to know why?" Dogbert responds, "Not really." Dilbert, Dogbert, and Bob the Dinosaur all have purple masks on. Dilbert says, "My internet provider won't let me cancel by phone or by e-mail." Dilbert continues, "The service agreement says I have to stage a daring commando raid on their headquarters." Bob asks, "Does this mask make me look fat?" Dogbert zaps Bob with a stun gun and says, "That joke is overused Bob." Bob falls over. Dogbert says to Dilbert, "The stun gun is in good working order." Dilbert and Dogbert are walking outside. Dilbert says, "Maybe I should carry the stun gun." Dogbert responds, "Don't worry, I'll do you last."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 23, 2002's comic on:


Tags #elbonia, #oversee construction, #nuclear power plant, #first order, #uranium, #director of security

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Headline: In Elbonia. Dilbert says to two Elbonians, "I'm here to oversee the construction of the nuclear power plant." Dilbert continues, "The first order of business is security for the uranium." An Elbonian responds, "A pig ate it." Dilbert exclaims, "What?! I demand to see your director of security!" The Elbonian answers, "You'll have to wait; the pig ate him too."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2001's comic on:


Tags #bad data, #data, #grossly inaccurate, #managing is hard

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "All of our data is grossly inaccurate... but I need data in order to manage." The Boss continues, "If I concentrate hard enough I can forget that the data is bad. Then I can use it." Wally and Dilbert watch as The Boss shakes with clenched teeth. Wally says, "I have to give him credit.; managing is harder than it looks."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 22, 2001's comic on:


Tags #complaints, #dating, #dog is perfect, #improve, #list, #lose weight, #need improvements, #new odor, #new wardrobe, #polish up, #new haircut, #relationships

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The dark haired woman from the gym and Dilbert are sitting on the couch. Dogbert is sitting on the arm rest next to them. The woman says, "I made a list of all the ways you need to improve in order to keep dating me." Dilbert reads the list aloud: "Lose forty pounds, new wardrobe, new haircut, new car, new odor..." The woman interupts, "But your dog is perfect. How'd that happen?" Dogbert replies, "When can you move in?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 01, 2001's comic on:


Tags #secretary, #carol, #order new chair, #new chair smell, #chair desert roll, #not important enough, #smelly chair, #mean nasty, #self centered, #delusional boss

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The Boss approaches Carol at her desk and says, "Carol, order a new chair for me. The old one lost its new chair smell." Carol responds, "Can I have your old chair? My chair doesn't roll anymore." The Boss replies tentatively, "'I'll try to say this tactfully. You're not important enough to sit in my smelly chair." Carol's eyes bug in offense.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 21, 2001's comic on:


Tags #loser, #no girlfreind, #business traveler, #call, #check her story, #order food, #waitress, #hard time, #restaurant

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Dilbert sits alone at a table in a restaurant. A waitress comes to take his order and he says, "I'm not a loser who can't get a date. I'm a business traveller." The waitress replies, "What's your girlfriend's name? I'll call her and check out your story." Dilbert, embarassed, looks down at his menu and says, "Maybe I should order." The waitress says, "Maybe you should."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 31, 2001's comic on:


Tags #mobile tech platform, #own wheelbarrow, #lost lung

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The Boss walks out of his office with his giant gadget and says, "Carol, order an extra battery for my mobile technology platform." Carol replies, "Do you want the one that straps to your back or the one with its own wheelbarrow?" The Boss is seen sweating, carrying a huge, heavy black thing on this back, and thinking, "I think I just lost a lung."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 30, 2001's comic on:


Tags #ultimate tool, #mobile professional, #pda, #phone, #pager, #digital camera, #fax, #email, #laptop, #shredder, #clips belt, #too large, #everything

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The Boss leans across a table and says to Dilbert, "I found the ultimate tool for the mobile professional." The Boss leans down in order to get it. He continues, "It's a combination PDA, phone, pager, digital camera, fax, e-mail, laptop and shredder." The Boss produces a large gadget, half the size of him and puts it on the table. He says, "It clips right to my belt!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 27, 2001's comic on:


Tags #recommend vendor, #internal debvelopers, #play out, #outside vendor, #clueless weasel, #begin work, #sign contract, #internal weasels complain, #use, #steaming mounds, #worthless code, #plan too much, #practiced yesterday

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Dilbert stands before the Boss giving a presentation. Dilbert says, "...And that's why I recommend using this vendor." The Boss asks, "Why don't we use our internal developers?" Dilbert replies, "Let me explain how this will play out." Dilbert begins drawing a diagram on the board. Dilbert says, "Step One: We select an outside vendor because our internal developers are clueless weasels." Dilbert continues, "Step Two: We sign a contract and begin work." Dilbert says, "Step Three: Our internal weasels complain to our VP and she order us to use them." Dilbert continues drawing a complex diagram on the board. Dilbert says, "Step Four: The outside vendor sues us while our weasels grunt out steaming mounds of worthless code." Dilbert returns home to Dogbert. Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Do I plan too much?" Dogbert says, "Is this the conversation we practiced yesterday?"