Other Thing Comic Strips - Page 6
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1000 Results for Other Thing
View 51 - 60 results for other thing comic strips. Discover the best "Other Thing" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday March 10,
2019
Tags #business ethics, #engineering, #government, #idea, #managers & supervisors, #math, #ocean, #research, #sarcasm, #science, #temperature, #tests
Transcript
Boss: We won a government contract to measure ocean temperatures. Dilbert: Which part of the ocean? Boss: The whole ocean. Dilbert: We can't put sensors everywhere in the ocean. It's too big. Boss: We can measure a bunch of places and estimate the rest. Dilbert: So...you want me to measure 1% of the ocean's temperature and estimate the other 99%? I don't know how to do that. Boss: Try using math. Dilbert: Wouldn't it be cheaper to measure nothing and just estimate the whole thing? Boss: Every now and then you come up with a great idea.
Tuesday February 12,
2019
Co2 Scrubber Too Efficient
Tags #earth, #mistake, #plants, #technology, #inventions, #atmosphere
Transcript
Dilbert: I've developed a super-efficient device that scrubs CO2 out of the air. But the user has to remember to turn it off after a few days or else it will remove too much CO2 and destroy all life on Earth. Man: Hey, who left this thing unplugged?
Friday February 01,
2019
Ten Year Financial Projections
Sunday January 27,
2019
Tags #argument, #boss, #business, #change, #frustration, #managers & supervisors, #money, #salary, #company
Transcript
Boss: I can't give you a raise because you didn't accomplish anything this year. Dilbert: Are you insane? I completely redesigned our line of products!!! Boss: That was mostly last year. Dilbert: You didn't give me a raise last year because I wasn't finished until January of this year. Now you aren't giving me a raise this year because I did most of the work last year. Give me one reason I shouldn't quit right now! Boss: Because every other company is just as bad. And you don't like change. Dilbert: I said one reason!
Tuesday January 15,
2019
More Accurate Job Description
Tags #distraction, #frustration, #jobs, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: I updated my job description to be more accurate. Boss: "I try to do something and then I get interrupted a jillion times until the thing no longer matters." Sounds like you need some extra micro-managing. Dilbert: I have to take this call.
Sunday December 23,
2018
Tags #boss, #employees, #employment, #managers & supervisors, #video games
Transcript
Boss: The job market is so tight that I had to hire this NPC. Dilbert: NPC? Boss: Non-player character. It's a video game term for a character that is programmed.As opposed to being an avatar for a human player. An NPC has limited programmed responses. Watch this. How's your day going? NPC: Not bad for a Monday. Boss: Can you help me on my project? NPC: I am too busy: Boss: What do you think of management? NPC: They are all dumb. Wally: I just bonded with that thing. Boss: See how fast you get used to it?
Friday December 14,
2018
Cake Is Healthy
Tags #cake, #diet, #employees, #employment, #health, #health food, #office, #office workers
Transcript
Boss: We're launching a health and wellness initiative for employees this week. In other news, we have cake in the break room to celebrate all of the birthdays this month. Dilbert: Because cake is healthy? Boss: Learn to compartmentalize.
Saturday December 01,
2018
Workplace Bully
Tags #boss, #bully, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #threat, #work
Transcript
Boss: Cheryl, the other employees are complaining that you're a workplace bully. Cheryl: Hand over your wallet or else I'll tell your boss you tried to give me a shoulder rub. Carol: Did you talk to her? Boss: Don't ever ask me to do anything for your again.
Friday November 09,
2018
Alice Makes Her Boss Look Good
Tags #boss, #employees, #insults, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #sarcasm
Transcript
Boss: Alice, always remember that a good employee makes her boss look good. Alice: Maybe I could toss a blanket over you when other people are around. Boss: I'm not talking about my physical appearance. Alice: The blanket would also muffle the sound.
Tuesday November 06,
2018
Speakerphones
Tags #boss, #criticism, #distraction, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #phone call, #sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: I accomplished nothing this week because my idiot co-workers continue to use their speakerphones in the office. This is compounded by the fact that my idiot boss doesn't allow me to work from home. If you need me, I'll be sitting in my cubicle doing nothing but waiting for other people's phone calls to end.