Sit At Computer Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Sit At Computer

View 51 - 60 results for sit at computer comic strips. Discover the best "Sit At Computer" comics from Dilbert.com.

People Get Dumber When Sitting Down

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
People Get Dumber When Sitting Down - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags intelligence, dumb, belief, furniture, new age, science, metaphysics

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Is it my imagination or do people get dumber when they sit down for a meeting? Or would you say you are equally dumb no matter what you are doing? Boss: Well, I'm no scientist, but I'm pretty sure feng shui is part of the answer.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computer, robot, replacement, doctor, medicine, obsolete, job, diagnose, necessity, technology, invention, business, medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor: IBM's Watson supercomputer has diagnosed your symptoms. The computer just ordered the meds you need. They will be delivered in an hour by drone. Dilbert: Looks like your job as a doctor is becoming obsolete. Doctor: Ha ha! No. You still need a doctor and a nurse to make the system work. For example, the computer can't read its own screen and speak those words to patients. Dilbert: Actually, it can. Doctor: But the computer doesn't have a nurse. Dilbert: What does the nurse do? Nurse: I stab him if he tries to do more than read the screen.

Computers Program Humans

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Computers Program Humans - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags robots, program, intelligence, control, medication, medicine, pill, technology, power

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: It is time to take your mood-altering prescription meds. Boss: Oh, right. Robot: Wait... IBM's Watson computer has added another prescription and sent it to your 3-D pill printer at home. Do you think robots will ever program humans? Boss: That's dumb.

Dilbert Goes Into Hiding

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Goes Into Hiding - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hiding, forget, forgotten, forgot, friendship, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Computer: This is Dilbert with an encrypted message from my hiding place from the government. Dogbert: Dilbert who? Dilbert: I only left yesterday!!! Dogbert: I don't like to dwell in the past.

Tina Strings Economic Words Together

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tina Strings Economic Words Together - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags economist, economy, deception, jargon, prediction, stock market, recession, money

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally The Chief Economist. Tina: My interview with you is live on the website. Nothing you said made sense, so I strung together a bunch of economic jargon and called it your forecast. One Month Later. Computer: Only one economist accurately predicted when this bubble would burst. Dilbert: Uh-oh.

Wally Does Economic Babble Talk

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Does Economic Babble Talk - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bitcoins, confusion, conversation, economics, jargon, success, the fed

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Do you think The Fed should liquidate its Bitcoins or let the dollar float with Libor rates? Boss: Maybe we could just sit quietly until the others arrive. Wally: Success.

Dogbert Makes A Product That Begs For Updates

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert Makes A Product That Begs For Updates - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags product design, product designer, cruelty, update, computer, reboot, operating system, torture, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert The Product Designer. Dogbert: I created an operating system that uses up 80% of your time begging for updates. That still leaves a healthy 20% of your time to... reboot your computer over and over. Boss: Can it fax?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computers, customer service, frustration, installing drivers, software, tech support, technical support, technology, engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's Tech Support. Dilbert: The error message says my copy of Windows is not genuine. Dogbert" I'll walk you through a series of steps that won't work. Dilbert: Wait... what? Dogbert: After seventeen attempts that involve rebooting, you will lose hope. At some point you will give up and buy a new computer just to be done with it all. We'll start by uninstalling all of your drivers and reinstalling. Dilbert: Can I skip all of the useless steps and just buy a new computer? Dogbert: Sure, but you don't need to be a jerk about it.

Text Is More Important Than Dilbert

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Text Is More Important Than Dilbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phones, distraction, power, subversion, text, text message, attention, pellet of attention, ignore, superior, demonstrate

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Hold on, I have a text message that is probably more important than you. I will demonstrate my power over you by handling a text message while you sit there, waiting for a pellet of my attention. Stop texting me! Dilbert: Mmm... pellet.

No More Than Eight People In A Meeting

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No More Than Eight People In A Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags autobiography, executives, ghost writers, quote, quotes, co author, meetings, rules

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Your rule is that no more than eight people should attend a meeting, so I can't let you sit down. CEO: When did I say that? Dilbert: It was in a book you co-wrote. CEO: I knew I should have skimmed that thing. Dilbert: Your unknown co-author is quite wise.