Stupid Comic Strips - Page 6
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254 Results for Stupid
View 51 - 60 results for stupid comic strips. Discover the best "Stupid" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday August 22,
2015
Dilbert And The Prison Gang
Tags prison, lawyer, attorney, Advice, plead, trial, crime, murder, technicality, guilt, legal
Transcript
Dogbert: Your brain stimulator invention turned you into a murderer. I will argue that you can't get a fail trial by jury of your peers because all of the people like you are already in jail for doing their own stupid stuff. And I signed you up for a prison gang. All you need to do is skin a snitch.
Thursday August 06,
2015
Teeth Brushing Accident
Tags insult, criticism, presentation, stupid, mean
Transcript
Coworker: Are there any questions about my presentation? Alice: Yes. Did you brush your teeth too aggressively and accidentally stab yourself in the brain? Coworker: Can you be more specific? Alice: Frontal lobes?
Sunday July 19,
2015
Tags public speaking, presentation, question, questions, stupid, idiot, idiots, criticism, critic
Transcript
Boss: I need you to critique my presentation for the board. And don't hold back to spare my feelings. Dilbert: That probably won't be an issue. Alice: We got this. Boss: My product idea has three components. Alice: How do you know another company isn't secretly preparing to launch the same product? Boss: What kind of stupid question is that? Alice: It's the same question you asked me yesterday about my product idea. Boss: The board won't ask that. Alice: Don't be so sure. I hear they're idiots.
Thursday June 18,
2015
Alice Breaks Up With Boyfriend
Tags breakup, dating, breaking up, drone, stalking, follow, spying, attention, relationships
Transcript
Alice: I'm breaking up with you because you don't give me enough attention. All you care about is your stupid aerial photography hobby. I wish you the best. That felt like a clean break.
Saturday June 13,
2015
Health Sensor Predictes Death
Tags invention, success, technology, health monitor, fitbit, smart watch, heart, heart rate, death, medical
Transcript
Ted: The health sensors you built into our smart watch prototype aren't working. According to your stupid sensors, my heart is going to stop beating in... Dilbert: Yay me!
Saturday May 09,
2015
Dilbert Fixes Boss's Technology Strategy
Tags verbiage, technical, jargon, deception, logic, team player, babble
Transcript
Dilbert: fixed your technology strategy. I couldn't make it sound logical, so I buried the stupid parts under seven layers of technical babble. Add an irrelevant graph and no one will be the wiser... literally. Boss: Please stop being a team player.
Monday January 26,
2015
What Phase Of The Project
Tags insult, insulting, project, questioning
Transcript
Boss: What phase is your project in? Dilbert: This is the phase where people ask stupid questions. Boss: How long does it last? Dilbert: It isn't looking good for today.
Wednesday May 28,
2014
Tags good attitude award, stupid award, screamed, nominated, award, peer voting, next month, employees, boss, business
Transcript
Boss: Alice, you've been nominated by your peers for the "good attitude award." Alice: Get out of here with your stupid, useless award!!! Boss: Maybe I shouldn't let peers do the voting. Wally: I like her odds to win again next month.
Friday May 09,
2014
Tags studies, healthy exercise, healthier lifestyle, poor health, ruin meeting, attend stupid meetings
Transcript
CEO: Studies show that people who exercise are healthier. Wally: That's because people who are in poor health don't exercise. CEO: Why does it seem as if you ruin every meeting? Wally: Is it because I only attend the ones that are stupid?
Monday April 07,
2014
Tags anger, interrupting work, jargon, meeting with boss, not enough passion, stupid trendy, performance evaluation
Transcript
Boss: You don't show enough passion for your job. Dilbert: Stop interrupting my work with your stupid, trendy management jargon! Was that better or worse? I don't know how to tell.


