After I Update Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

349 Results for After I Update

View 51 - 60 results for after i update comic strips. Discover the best "After I Update" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 08, 1989's comic on:


Tags #aliens, #dog, #history, #animals, #education

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert walks on a sidewalk. Someone behind him says, "Uh . . . Excuse me, earth dog." An alien says to Dogbert, "We have traveled from a distant planet to find out why earth dogs are forced to eat from dirty little bowls while humans use plates." Dogbert and the aliens sit on the grass. Dogbert explains, "Well, basically, it's political. It all began after the unsuccessful poodle rebellion in France, around 1723 . . ." One alien whispers to the other, "Better use a pencil . . ."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 13, 1989's comic on:


Tags #walk, #watching, #different

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Did you ever notice that people walk a little differently when other people are watching?" Dogbert replies, "No, never." Dilbert and Dogbert look at each other. Dilbert asks, "Don't you need to go anywhere?" Dogbert replies, "After you, banjo legs."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 03, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #tennis, #cans, #cannibals

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert stand on a tennis court holding rackets. Dilbert asks, "Did you bring a can of balls as I asked you to?" Dogbert replies, "Uh . . . Did you say CAN OF BALLS? I'll be right back." Dogbert says to a cannibal in a grass skirt, "Sorry, turns out we don't need you after all." The cannibal asks, "How about if I just eat the loser?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 04, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #coffee, #third-degree

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks away from the coffee machine holding a cup of coffee. Dilbert says, "Now for the hard part: getting back to my desk without third-degree wrist burns." Dilbert screams. Dilbert stands outside his cubicle rubbing his wrist after spilling the coffee on the floor. Dilbert says, "I don't care for the taste, but it DOES keep me alert."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 25, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Kids, #adults, #woman, #cooties, #faking it

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks down the hall thinking, "Sometimes I feel like a kid in an adult's body, hoping nobody notices." Dilbert thinks, "It's as if I stopped maturing and just started faking it after age fourteen." Dilbert passes a woman and thinks, "I'll bet women never feel that way." The woman thinks, "Cooties."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #terrarium, #failure, #weather, #patterns, #climatic, #experiment

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert leans over a table looking at a glass container. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "My terrarium experiment is a failure." Dilbert continues, "By now it should have started its own self-contained weather patterns." Dilbert continues, "After all this waiting, it's just so . . . so . . ." Dogbert asks, "Anti-climatic?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 29, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #so-called, #unwritten rules, #porcupines, #balloon store

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the desk. Dogbert says, "I've decided to write down all of the so-called 'unwritten rules.'" Dogbert looks at a piece of paper and says, "So far I have 'Don't phone after ten p.m.' and . . . Uh . . ." Dilbert asks, "That's it?" Dogbert asks, "How about 'Don't throw porcupines in a balloon store?'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 27, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #performance, #job, #pencils, #Right, #office

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "I decided to recognize you for your job performance." The Boss continues, "So I named one of my pencils after you." Dilbert says, "Gosh. Is that it right there?" The Boss replies, "No. That's my good pencil."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #torso, #flattery, #expand, #pop, #Dilbert, #mollusks, #time

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "After tugging a loose thread on his shirt . . ." Dilbert's head is missing. Dilbert kneels on the ground in front of Dogbert and says, "Do something." Dogbert says, "Hmm . . . Head got sucked into torso, huh?" Dogbert continues, "I'll try flattery . . . Your head will expand and pop right out . . ." Later, Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, ". . . And you are superior to mollusks in every way but looks . . ." Dilbert says, "I felt something that time."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 04, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #michael, #microchip, #Dogbert, #arm chair, #reality, #dreams, #electronics, #consumber

View Transcript

Transcript

Michael: ...after you leave you will not remember being inside your computer talking to a microchip. You will purchase worthless computer upgrades and argue that it saves money in the long run. Dilbert: It's a static byte Dwinkelizer... A necessity really.