Apply For Job Comic Strips - Page 6
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934 Results for Apply For Job
View 51 - 60 results for apply for job comic strips. Discover the best "Apply For Job" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday September 28,
1993
Tags #ted, #Dilbert, #job offer, #office
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. A man asks, "Have I told you recently that I have a lucrative job offer from our competitor?" Dilbert replies, "Yes." The man continues, "The pay is obscene, they wear casual clothes at work, and Wednesday through Friday is free beer and pizza." The man continues, "As the new guy I get to date the masseuse until the company matches me with an attractive co-worker." Dilbert covers his eyes and sobs.
Thursday September 30,
1993
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #office, #job offer
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dilbert says, "One of my co-workers got a much better job at another company. I'm feeling quite envious." Dogbert says, "Instead of feeling sad, you should make a list of all the things you have that he doesn't." Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table writing a list. Dogbert says, "So far, you have a birthmark, a fear of spiders and the list itself." Dilbert says, "I had the birthmark removed."
Monday October 04,
1993
Tags #the boss, #Dogbert, #job, #application, #Promotion
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk and shouts, "I'm a loud dog! Give me a job! You must obey me because I'm loud!" The Boss says, "Okay okay." Dogbert says, "That was too easy. There must be something wrong with the job. It must be an entry level job . . ." Dogbert stands on the desk and kicks something at the Boss. Dogbert shouts, "I want a raise!! Promote me, you imbecile!!" The Boss thinks, "Bad trend."
Saturday October 16,
1993
Tags #Dogbert, #ratbert, #retirement, #quit job, #philanthropy
Transcript
Dogbert and Ratbert sit on the hassock. Ratbert asks, "Why did you quit your job as company president?" Dogbert replies, "I made a fortune on my stock options and retirement payout." Dogbert says, "I'm going to turn my attention to philanthropy." Ratbert asks, "Is that the study of people named Phil?" Dogbert replies, "It's mostly about watching people beg and having buildings named after me."
Wednesday January 05,
1994
Tags #no raises, #promotions, #job titles, #named beverly
Transcript
The Boss: We're flattening the organization to eliminate levels and put everybody in a wide salary band. Now instead of not getting a promotion. you'll only not get a raise, wally: So what job title do we use? The Boss: You'll all be named Beverly.
Friday March 18,
1994
Tags #organ donor, #reorganizations, #unwanted employees, #what job
Transcript
Wally: Sometimes I think these constant reorganizations are just excuses for getting rid of unwanted employees. Wally: what job did you end up with? Dilbert: Organ donor Wally: My shoulder is acting up. Do I talk to you or is there a form to fill out? Dilbert: I don't think thats an "Organ"
Wednesday June 22,
1994
Tags #job pays, #headhunter, #move, #cold place, #drivers license, #look up gender, #phone call, #man, #inquiring about job
Transcript
Dogbert the headhunter Dogbert: The job pays a hundred thousand. But you'll have to move to a place thats so cold that mercury freezes. Man: I'll take it. How bad could it be? Dogbert: Keep your drivers license on you is you can look up your gender if you forget
Thursday June 23,
1994
Tags #called to brag, #dogbert headhunting service, #no skill, #pays 100k, #dogbert job
Transcript
"This is Dogbert's Headhunting Service." "I've got a job that pays a hundred thousand per year and requires no skill whatsoever." "No, I didn't say it's available. I called to brag about my own job."
Saturday July 16,
1994
Tags #dimly lit cucbicle, #carpal tunnel, #crippled, #last job, #coal miner, #gas explosion, #new cubcile, #canary
Transcript
"I guess it's time to go back to my dimly lit cubicle and see if my carpal tunnel has crippled me yet." "This is a lot like my last job as a coal miner, but without the threat of a gas explosion." "I'm moving you to a new cubicle over by Wally." "Better get a canary."
Wednesday August 03,
1994
Tags #best assets, #competitions worst, #employees on job, #hidden camera, #imply, #they work for competition, #ad agency, #dogbert's ad agency
Transcript
Dogbert's Ad Agency Dogbert: Your commercial should compare your best assets to the competition's worst. we'll use a hidden camera to film your employees on the job. The Boss: I missed something here... Dogbert: we'll imply that they all work for the competition . this isn't a documentary.