Best Artists Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

287 Results for Best Artists

View 51 - 60 results for best artists comic strips. Discover the best "Best Artists" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 07, 2007's comic on:


Tags #managing, #easier, #awards for best places, #work, #handle situation, #losers

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Managing is a lot easier now that we've given up on winning one of those 'Best Places to Work' awards. Dilbert: "Do you have a minute?" The Boss: "Not for losers." "There was a time when I wouldn't have known how to handle that situation."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 2007's comic on:


Tags #best donuts, #diet, #employee eats, #top five, #donut eating, #tempting, #envy, #boss diet, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: "How's your diet coming along?" "MM-GUWUNG-MM-GUH-MUH!" "It's hard to pick the one best doughnut I've ever had, but this one is in my top five."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 2013's comic on:


Tags #best customers, #combo pack, #creepy bearded guys, #potato chips, #retail business, #tissues

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Research shows that your best customers are creepy bearded guys. That same group also buys a high volume of potato chips and tissues. Boss: How's that help us? Dogbert: Two words: Combo Pack.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 07, 2013's comic on:


Tags #best policy, #lying, #powerless, #superpower, #truth, #honesty is best policy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Honesty is the best policy... whenever you think lying won't work. Otherwise, lying is awesome. It's like a freakin' superpower! Ratbert: Why am I here? Dogbert: I speak truth to the powerless.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 08, 2013's comic on:


Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #joking, #experts, #best leaders, #good sense of humour, #awesome leader, #hilarous, #laugh

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Experts say the best leaders have a good sense of humor. I'm an awesome leader, therefore I must be hilarious. Wally: I can't tell if I should laugh at that. Boss: That's because you're not a leader.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 03, 2008's comic on:


Tags #adopting best practices, #industry, #mediocrity, #mediocre, #practices

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "We will be adopting the best practices in our industry, just like everyone else." Dilbert says, "If everyone is doing it, best practices is the same thing as mediocre." The Boss says, "STOP MAKING MEDIOCRITY SOUND BAD!" Dilbert says, "Sorry."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 26, 2010's comic on:


Tags #new vice president of engineering, #office, #lack of experience, #revenge, #office politics, #worry, #sabotage, #best engineer, #4g, #skeptical, #false information

View Transcript

Transcript

The New VP The Boss says, "Don't worry that I wanted your job, or that you have no experience in this field." The Boss says, "I won't try to sabotage you. In fact, I'll send you my best engineer to bring you up to speed." Vice President says, "So... it's called 4G because it's G-G-G-Good." Wally says, "Something like that."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 16, 2010's comic on:


Tags #robot body, #human brain, #best talent, #display case

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I found a way to keep our best talent from leaving." Dilbert says, "Wow! You found a way to interface a human brain with a robot body to get the best of both!" The Boss says, "Actually, it's just a cool display case, but your thing would be good too."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 28, 2008's comic on:


Tags #answer technical question, #bad actor, #best person, #fake own death, #helping customer, #insult dead, #just a quick question, #polite, #safest course, #work that divison, #commercial sales

View Transcript

Transcript

A man says, "Hi, I'm a customer of your commercial sales division." "The man says, "I heard you would be the best person to answer a technical question..." Dilbert says, "I don't work in that division." The man says, "I know. It's just a quick question." Dilbert says, "If I tell you something different from what the commercial division tells you, I'll get in trouble." Dilbert says, "But I'll also get in trouble for not helping a customer." Dilbert says, "My safest course of action is to fake my own death." The man says, "You're a bad actor." Dilbert says, "It isn't polite to insult the dead."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 19, 2007's comic on:


Tags #changes, #pension plan, #company wide, #email, #read email, #compulsion, #details, #engineers, #brain, #best meeting, #humiliate boss, #called out

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "I called this meeting to discuss the changes to the pension plan." Alice: "We already saw the company-wide e-mail about the changes." Dilbert: "And we're all engineers, so we understand the details better than you do." Alice: "I'll bet you intend to waste our time by reading the e-mail to us." ask: "You can't stop yourself. it's some sort of compulsion." Alice: "If you read that e-mail, it's proof that something is wrong with your brain." The Boss: "Can't...resist...reading...e-mail." "GAAA!!!" Alice & Dilbert: "Best meeting ever."