Career As Director Comic Strips - Page 6
394 Results for Career As Director
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Share April 10, 1998's comic on:
Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert tells Ted and Dilbert, "There will be no layoffs after the merger." Catbert says, "However, many of you will be transferred to jobs on a frozen." Ted asks, "Will we have protective space suits?" Catbert says, "I label you 'not a team player'."
Share May 02, 1998's comic on:
Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert tells The Boss, "I'm having trouble finding qualified external applicants." Catbert says, "All I have are a headless man, a mime, and a frozen cro-magnon guy we found in a glacier." The Boss asks, "Does the mime bring his own invisible cubicle? I love those!" Catbert replies, "Only if we pay his relocation costs."
Share May 05, 1998's comic on:
Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert says, "Alice, the experts say you need to balance work and home life." Catbert says, "You worked 80 hours last week. That's less than half of the hours in a week." Catbert says, "Give us some balance, you selfish hag." Alice replies, "This conversation took a nasty turn."
Share May 13, 1998's comic on:
Headline: Catbert: H.R. Director. Catbert is sitting on The Boss' desk. Catbert says, "When you dumped more work on Wally, did he moan? Or did he scream?" The Boss responds, "It sounded like this... Aaoo-muw-aahh-ow-ow!!" Catbert walks down the hall and thinks, "The staffing levels sound about right."
Share May 21, 1998's comic on:
Dilbert and Allen walking down a hall. Dilbert asks, "So, Allen, what's it like to be a hideous sycophant?" Allen replies, "It's okay." Allen asks, "What's it like to have no hope of career advancement?" Dilbert responds, "Not bad." Allen and Dilbert sitting at table with food trays. Allen asks, "Were you born that way or is it a lifestyle choice?" Dilbert responds, "I'll ask my mom, but I think it was bad parenting."
Share May 23, 1998's comic on:
Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert sitting on desk while Alice puts her hand on her head and says, "My eyes are sore from using the computer." Catbert says, "Try typing with your fingers, the way everyone else does." Catbert lays on top of his computer and thinks, "Personally, I find computers very restful on my eyes."
Share June 08, 1998's comic on:
Caption: Catbert: Evil H.R. Director Catbert on The Boss' desk. The Boss sitting behind the desk. Catbert says, "Bad news: The employees are reading a newspaper." Catbert continues, "If they see the low unemployment rate, they'll know the balance of power has swung their way." Wally, Dilbert, and Alice sitting at table with newspapers on it. Alice holding a newspaper. Wally says, I plan to use the cat as a gargoyle on my cubicle roof." Dilbert responds, "If you run a current through him you can zap bugs."
Share August 05, 1998's comic on:
Caption: Catbert: Evil H.R. Director. Catbert sits behind a desk, a women sits on the other side. The woman says, "I'm grossly underpaid for the type of work I do now." Catbert says, "Write a description of your current duties. I'll be happy to do a compensation review." Caption: Based on a true story. Catbert says, "Sadly, it appears you're not qualified for your own job. But one of your subordinates is." Woman's eyes widen.
Share August 10, 1998's comic on:
Caption: Catbert: Evil H.R. Director. Catbert interviews a man. Catbert says, "Are you able to work while being constantly interrupted?" The man says, "No. I would be totally ineffective, just like anyone else." Catbert says, "We were done with the section you had to answer honestly." The man says, "Oh. In that case, interruptions make me stronger."
Share August 19, 1998's comic on:
Caption: Catbert: Evil H.R. Director. Catbert sits at his desk. A male employee with glasses stands. Catbert says, "You've been a good contract employee. We'd like to make you a regular employee." The employee says, "You mean you want to pay me less?" Catbert says, "We want you to be motivated by something other than money." The employee says, "Like...stupidity?"