Compensation Packages Comic Strips - Page 6

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55 Results for Compensation Packages

View 51 - 55 results for compensation packages comic strips. Discover the best "Compensation Packages" comics from Dilbert.com.

No Raise For Dilbert

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No Raise For Dilbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, employees, employment, managers & supervisors, office workers, sarcasm, work, salary

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Dilbert: Can I have a 25% raise to get my compensation up to market levels? Boss: No. Dilbert: Okay. I'll just work 25% less because you won't know the difference. Boss: I would know if you did that. Dilbert: Should I get back to separating the zeroes from the ones in our database?

Layoff Package

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Layoff Package - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, fire, office, office workers, buyout

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dilbert, the boss and wally at conference room table. the boss: the company is announcing generous buyout packages for employees who elect to leave. dilbert: won't all the smart people leave first because they can easily get new jobs at higher pay? the boss: ummm... dilbert: if you don't get enough volunteers, will you start firing people? the boss: we have no plan to do that. dilbert: will you make a plan if too few people leave? the boss: oh, yes. dilbert: would it be fair to say the people who stay will envy the dead? the boss: um... one week later: the boss: how many took the offer? carol: it's just you now.

Performance Versus Pay

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Performance Versus Pay - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags angry, big business, employees, irritation, managers & supervisors, money, salary

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Boss: I can't give you a bonus this year because we paid too much to buy another company. Dilbert: Are you saying my efforts and my rewards are no longer linked? Boss: Noooo. I'm not saying anything like that. I'm just saying your compensation isn't influenced by your performance. Dilbert: That's the same thing! Boss: Teamwork means we all share the rewards and we all have to share the pain. Dilbert: Does that mean management won't be getting bonuses either? Boss: Now you've made it awkward.

Reimagine Ted's Job

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Reimagine Ted's Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boring, business, job, new, pay, projects, reimagine, technology, compensation

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boss: ted, we need to reimagine your job. ted: i hope that means you will replace the boring parts of my job with exciting new projects. boss: it doesn't mean that. boss: does it mean doing the same work for higher pay?

Teamwork But

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Teamwork But - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, business, teamwork, limit, competition, salary, funds, battle, meeting, thinking, sarcasm

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boss: the key to success is teamwork. dilbert: then why does our compensation system pit employees against each other to battle for limited funds salary funds? boss: this meeting will go a lot smoother if you stop doing whatever you're doing right now. dilbert: i call it "thinking."