Consulting Form Comic Strips - Page 6

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View 51 - 60 results for consulting form comic strips. Discover the best "Consulting Form" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #product design, #consumer electronics, #form emotional bond, #ego influenced, #design process

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Product designer Dogbert: I bring you the future of product design for consumer electronics. Dogbert: Behold Natures perfect shape! your customers will form and emotional bond, Dilbert: Do you think your ego influenced the design process? The boss: Its wagging. Dogbert: Bah!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bill for consulting, #past year, #all in head, #recommendation, #status quo, #everything right

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Dogbert: Here's my bill for the consulting work I've done for you over the past year. The Boss: "What consulting? I haven't seen any reports." Dogbert: "I did it all in my head. I don't like to waste paper." The Boss: "What's your recommendation?" Dogbert: "Status Quo. You're doing everything right."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #paying for consulting, #no recommendations, #feel secure, #shaping strategies, #hate you, #feel good

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"I keep paying you for consulting, but you never make any recommendations." "I'm what you call a "feel good."" "My job is to make you feel secure in the knowledge that someone brilliant is shaping your strategies." "This is weird; I hate you, but at the same time I feel good." "You're welcome."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #police action, #neotaiotor, #evaluation form, #surrender

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Police Negotiator "SURRENDER NOW AND YOU WON'T GET HURT!!!" "Here he comes." BAM BAM BAM "I'll leave an evaluation form. Please let us know how we're doing." "Done deal."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #carol, #worst secretary, #fired, #involuntary termination form 904-b, #fill out form

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"Carol, you're the worst secretary ever. I have to let you go." "You can't fire me until you fill out the Involuntary Termination Form 904-B." "Can you get me one of those?" "Yeah. I'll get right on that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #double fees, #management consulting, #outsourcing job, #india, #double fee

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I found a way to double my management consulting fees. "I recommend outsourcing your job to India." "I'll double your fee if you never say that again." WAG!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #board meeting, #outsourcing, #ceo job, #26 million, #elbonian ceo, #good guy, #consulting contract

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Board Meeting "I recommend outsourcing your CEO's job and saving the company $26 million per year." "For $4 per year you can hire an Elbonian CEO who is just as good as this guy." "Now do you understand why you should have renewed my consulting contract?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #happiness, #work ethic, #busy work, #cheerful, #form of insanity, #worthless assignments, #professional help, #psychology

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Asok: I completed the busywork you assigned to me and I'm still cheerful! I don't know how I do it. I really don't. I assume it's a form of insanity. Do you have more worthless assignments I could do before I seek professional help? Boss: Yup.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office buildings, #economic consulting, #benefits of standing

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Boss: I hired The Dogbert Ergonomic Consulting Company to tell us about the health benefits of standing. Dogbert: Standing be good. Boss: That's it? Dogbert: The topic isn't as complicated as you might think.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cell phone product, #form of radiation, #negative effect, #head turn red, #weight loss, #new cell phone, #positive spin

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The Boss says, "We have a little problem with our new cell phone product." "It gives off a form of radiation that has a negative effect on the user." Dilbert says, "How bad is it?" The Boss says, "Well, it makes your head turn red, and you lose weight." A person says, "Hey, what is up with our new cell phone? I feel different." A janitor says, "Can I borrow your friend?" The Boss says, "I don't see why not." The person says, "AAAIII!!!" GLUB GLUB GLUB The Boss says, "Anyway, see if you can put a positive spin on that."