Email Two Copies Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

827 Results for Email Two Copies

View 51 - 60 results for email two copies comic strips. Discover the best "Email Two Copies" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ted, #carol, #message, #manager, #secretary, #copies, #sting, #desire

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted: May I slip in? I only need one copy. Carol: What's the message here? Is your time worth more than my time because you're a manager and I'm a secretary? Huh? This might sting for a second, but it'll remove your desire to make copies.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #shared laser printer, #apollo space mission, #wally invented cursor

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally presses a button on his keyboard and thinks, "Gotta hurry. One . . . two . . . three . . ." Wally runs out of his cubicle and thinks, "I have twelve seconds to get to the shared laser printed." As Wally peers around the corner, Alice and Dilbert stand at the printer reading copies of Wally's resume. Alice says, "Guess who saved the Apollo 13 space mission." Dilbert says, "Did you know that Wally invented the cursor?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #3d colored pie chart, #unexplained rise, #expenses, #binder, #rising expenses, #color copies cost, #i see it, #magic eye doofus

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss points to a diagram created with an overhead projector and says, "This 3-D colored pie chart shows an unexplained rise in expenses." The Boss continues, "You each get a binder of colored pie charts so you can help find the cause of our rising expenses." Wally asks Dilbert and Alice, "How much do color copies cost?" Dilbert looks at the binder and says, "I think I see it!" Alice says, "It's not the 'magic eye,' Doofus."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boring, #idiotic coworkers, #main accomplishment, #newsletter, #no raise, #performance review, #two percent raise, #uninteresting, #value of team work

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Performance Review." Tina the Tech Writer sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Your main accomplishment was the department newsletter which was both uninteresting and unimportant. You get no raise." Tina looks shocked and says, "The newsletter was YOUR idea, and it's boring because most of the articles are contributed by my idiotic co-workers." The Boss says, "You don't seem to understand the value of teamwork." Tina replies, "I understand its value; it just cost me a two-percent raise."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #had a cat once, #two hours, #beef of cat, #selfish

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice, Wally and Dilbert sit at the lunch table. Wally says, "I had a cat once . . ." Wally continues, "I petted that thing for two hours but I didn't feel any better." Dilbert says, "Petting is for the benefit of the cat, not your hand." Wally says, "They're so selfish."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #two percent annual, #disppoint, #compensated, #drastic, #low expectations, #good sign, #thinking

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice sits at a manager's desk and yells, "A two percent annual raise?!! Wowee!!" Alice continues, "Ha ha! You tried to disappoint me but I compensated by drastically lowering my expectations!" Wally and Dilbert peer in the door and see Alice dancing on a chair and shouting, "Weeee!!" Dilbert says, "Yeah, it MIGHT be a good sign, but I'm thinking not."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hunk, #burning love, #cubicle, #working, #sending steamy email, #send to all, #thank you

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina types, "Tom, you delicious hunk of burning love: if you were in my cubicle now I'd . . ." Tina thinks, "It looks as if I'm working. Nobody can tell that I'm sending steamy e-mail to my new boyfriend." Dilbert says to Tina, "Tina, two things: watch out for the 'send to all' address, and thank you very much." Dilbert's tie and his hair stand up straight.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #audit, #documented procedures, #divided, #two groups, #unethical, #unprodcutive, #train department, #lie to auditor, #document, #inane prcedures

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Wally and Dilbert sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "We'll be having an ISO 9000 audit soon. They'll check to see if we follow our own documented procedures for everything we do." The Boss continues, "I've divided our preparation tasks into two groups: unethical and unproductive." Wally tells Dilbert, "I'll train our department to lie to the auditor. You can document our inane procedures." Dilbert replies, "No fair. You did unethical last time too!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #award, #tim, #incredible accomplishments, #two years stonewalling, #hired

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Alice and Dilbert, "This award goes to Tim for his incredible accomplishment." The Boss hands Tim an award and says, "After two years of stonewalling all progress, Tim finally agreed to do the work for which he was hired." The Boss continues, "We look forward to working with Tim in the coming year." Tim says, "As if I'd have time for that."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annual performance review, #past two weeks, #vacation, #two weeks, #spread motivation

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss hands Tina the Tech Writer a document. He says, "Here's you annual performance review, Tina." The Boss continues, "I focused on your performance for the past two weeks because I don't remember anything farther back." Tina screams, "I was on VACATION for the past two weeks!!!" The Boss replies, "No time to chat. I need to spread some motivation over here."