Everyone Laid Off Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

841 Results for Everyone Laid Off

View 51 - 60 results for everyone laid off comic strips. Discover the best "Everyone Laid Off" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #shot scapegoat, #nra cook off, #accusations started

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks with the scapegoat whose arm is in a sling. Dilbert says, "I'm sorry you got shot, scapegoat." The scapegoat says, "I'm used to it." The scapegoat says, "The worst was the day I blundered across the National Rifle Association's chili cook-off" The scapegoat says, "At first, verybody wanted to stand near me. Then the accusations started...."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #employee skills, #database, #moving everyone, #jobs, #laughed fuzzy

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert sits at a conference table with Wally and Asok. Catbert says, "I'm starting an employee skills database." Asok raises his hand and says, "Question: Is this the first step in moving everyone to jobs they don't want?" Catbert says, "No, no, no..... The first step was when I laughed myslef fuzzy thinking about it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #strategic plan, #everyone supports, #a way to copy, #images, #piece of paper

View Transcript

Transcript

A balding man with extreamly long hair and beard sees Alice in the hall. Bearded man says, "I did it!" Bearded man says, "It's a strategic technology plan that everyone supports." ALice smiles. Bearded man says, "If only there were a way to copy images from one piece of paper to many." Alice frowns.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #great turnaround ceo, #turn around, #head in hand

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok comes up to the new CEO sitting at his desk and who looks like the devil and says, "Everyone says you're a great turnaround CEO." Asok continues, "What does it take to turn around a company like this one?' Asok is walking off, holding his head under his arm and the head is thinking, "I guess it's better to not be noticed the first month."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #everyone can come, #blame traffic, #sociopth, #get enough sleep

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says to Dilbert: "I scheduled the meeting for 6:00 A.M. so everyone can make it." Dilbert says to the boss: "I assume you'll show up at eight o'clock and blame the traffic." The boss walks away and says: "The great thing about being a sociopath is that I always get enough sleep."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pay slip, #increased complexity, #won't know, #rip off, #clueless, #in the dark, #happy to be evil, #cheat, #evil catbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert the Evil HR Director says to the staff, "We increased the complexity of your pay slip." Catbert yells, "Now you'll never know when we rip you off! Yeeha! Yeeha!" Dilbert says to Wally, "The only part that really bugs me is the yeehas."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #part time work, #finish urgent projects, #pay cut, #come in on day off

View Transcript

Transcript

Noriko asks the Boss, "Would it be okay if I worked part-time?" The Boss answers, "That depends." The Boss continues, "Would you be willing to come in on your days off to finish urgent projects?" Noriko replies, "Yes." Dilbert asks Noriko during lunch, "So, basically you negotiated a fifty percent pay cut?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fired everyone, #used the internet, #personal stuff, #wrinkle, #policy, #web

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert is standing on the boss's desk. Catbert says, "I fired everyone who used the internet for personal stuff." Catbert continues, "The only wrinkle in that policy is that you and I are the only employees left." Catbert says, "And frankly, I use the web for personal stuff too." The boss says, "Can you teach me how?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #positive reinforcement, #addicted, #wearing off, #crazy woman, #drool, #lunch room, #boss words

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Alice and Wally are eating lunch. Alice says, "I experienced something called positive reinforcement today." Alice continues, "I'm addicted to it now... But it's wearing off... Must get more..." Alice says, "Say something nice about me!" Dilbert chews his lunch as Wally says, "For a crazy woman you don't drool much."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #billion shares, #dot com subsidary, #fire everyone, #presdient, #raise, #stock, #promoting

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, "I'm promoting you to president of our dot-com subsidiary." The Boss says to Dilbert, "Your job is to fire everyone." Dilbert asks, "Would I get a raise?" The Boss answers, "How does a billion shares of stock sound?"