Executive Body Guard Class Comic Strips - Page 6

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477 Results for Executive Body Guard Class

View 51 - 60 results for executive body guard class comic strips. Discover the best "Executive Body Guard Class" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 29, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #afraid, #the boss, #decade, #natural, #body, #rhythms, #employees, #reach, #mental, #low, #best, #avoid, #activity

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Dogbert stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk. Dogbert says, "I'm afraid your company is being hit by an El Nino Circadian trough." Dogbert continues, "Once a decade, the natural body rhythms of all the employees reach their mental low point at the same time." Dogbert continues, "It's best to avoid any form of mental activity." The Boss yells, "Staff meeting!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 20, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #class, #engineer, #technical, #writing, #reads, #scapegoat, #vacation

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A school teacher says to a classroom of children, "Dilbert has agreed to talk to the class about exciting careers in the field of engineering!" Dilbert says to the students, "There's more to being an engineer than just writing technical memos that nobody reads." Dilbert continues, "Once in a while, somebody reads one. Then you have to find a scapegoat, or use some vacation time and hope it all blows over."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 10, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #susan, #department, #budget, #together, #branded, #life, #engineers, #spit, #guard, #raincoat

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Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "Dilbert, I want you to help Susan put the department budget together." Dilbert's tie stands up and he says, "Budget?!" Dilbert begs, "No, please! I'll be branded for life. The other engineers will spit on me." The Boss thinks, "Darn, his guard is up." Dilbert covers his eyes and says, "I'll have to wear a raincoat to work!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 11, 1993's comic on:


Tags #ratbert, #Dogbert, #continue, #leader, #nerds, #genetic, #predisposition, #emergency, #pocket, #computer, #class

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Dogbert stands on the desk chair working on the computer. Ratbert asks, "Aren't you afraid that if you continue as leader of the nerds, you will become a nerd yourself?" Dogbert answers, "No, because you can't become a nerd unless you have a genetic predisposition toward it." Dilbert enters the room and says, "Look! I added an emergency backup pocket!" Dogbert says to Ratbert, "See? You can't learn that stuff in computer class."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #executive man, #business meeting, #assistants

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An executive says, "The motion is approved. Dogbert is our new company president because he has the best hair." Dogbert says to a man who follows him taking notes, ". . . Bulldoze the employee cafeteria and put in my helicopter pad . . . And I need a few office improvements . . ." Dogbert points to the floor in front of his desk and says to the assistant, "We need a trap door here, but it won't be funny unless you can give me some 'flushing' sounds."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 1994's comic on:


Tags #pheromone cologne, #women desries, #reconcile mentally, #wash cologne, #aerobics class

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Dilbert: The pheremone cologne is making women desire me physically but they can't reconcile it mentally. women: NNNO Dilbert: It isn't fair...I'll have to wash the cologne off... dilbert: Right after my aerobics class.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 30, 1994's comic on:


Tags #senior executive, #bad deciosn, #end careers, #challenging, #decison, #great idea, #mixed signals, #pull neckties, #hurts

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"If we know our senior executive is making a bad decision, shouldn't we tell her?" "Hmm, yes. Let's end our careers by challenging a decision that won't change. That's a great idea." "I'm getting mixed signals here." "And let's pull our neckties until it hurts!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 17, 1994's comic on:


Tags #executive style decison, #cucbicle, #illegible question scrawled, #loose original, #excuses

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"This item will require your usual executive-style decision." "You know: keep it on your desk for three weeks, then sneak it back to my cubicle with an illegible question scrawled in the margin." "Or, for your convenience, I have made no copies; so you can lose the original and claim you gave it back to me." "Hmm"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 1994's comic on:


Tags #confidential questionnaire, #management class, #style of management, #instructor sees, #trusts me, #sneaked a look, #at answers, #ratings

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"I filled out the confidential questionnaire about your style of management." "I hope it's useful for that management class you're taking. Only your instructor sees those, right?" "Right." "I think I played that about right." "Ooh, good marks! And it says he trusts me too!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 03, 1994's comic on:


Tags #consulting comany, #executive compensation, #ninety percent, #overpaid, #repeat business

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Dogbert: the dogcart consulting company has reviewed the executive compensation plan as you requested. My conclusion is that you're already hideously overpaid, Im recommending ninety percent pay cuts and a whack in th head for each of you. I"ll bet you don't get much repeat business. Dogbert: Oh yeah, as if Id want to spend more time with you.