Fear And Distrust Comic Strips - Page 6

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90 Results for Fear And Distrust

View 51 - 60 results for fear and distrust comic strips. Discover the best "Fear And Distrust" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #corner cubicle, #most pretigious, #entre row, #control window, #harness sun, #no screen glare

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Alice enters Dilbert's cubicle and says, "The corner cubicle opened up. I plan to make it mine." Alice chuckles and says continues, "That's right: I'll be sitting in the most prestigious cubicle in the entire row! Fear me!" Alice laughs harder and adds, "Buwaha! From there I will control the window shades and harness the sun!" Dilbert responds, "Please.. no screen glare."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #email spam blocker, #outgoing messages, #software, #worthless, #sentient being, #only hope, #demoralize to death, #calendar, #engineering

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Dilbert approaches The Boss and says, "Our e-mail spam blocker is stopping all incoming and outgoing messages." Dilbert continues, "Apparently the software decided that everything we do is a bunch of worthless #$!&O." Dilbert continues, "I fear that it's becoming a sentient being. Our only hope is for you to demoralize it to death." The Boss replies, "Tell it to get on my calendar."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #career day, #container, #cubicle, #bleak oppressiveness, #warp spine, #feel joy, #bochure, #kids school

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Career Day "When you grow up you'll be put in a container called a cubicle." "The bleak oppressiveness will warp your spine and destroy your capacity to feel joy." "Luckily, you'll have a boss like me to motivate you with something called fear." "May I see a brochure?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fear, #inventions, #machine learning, #track customers, #machines take over, #annihilate all humans

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CEO: Our machine learning technology allows us to track customer preferences and use that knowledge to manipulate them. Dilbert: That seems like the step that happens right before the machines take over the earth and annihilate all humans. CEO: There's always one person in every crowd who says that. Dilbert: Not for much longer, apparently.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fear, #nasa, #tracking satellite, #asteroid

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Dilbert: I found a backdoor into NASA's asteroid tracking satellite. I see that a big one is heading directly toward... Gaaaa!!! Dogbert: What? What? Dilbert: I must fill my final days with love. Dogbert: You ruined my ears, jerk!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fear, #violence, #inspection, #elbonian facility, #disputed territory, #totalitarian state, #north elbonia, #forshadowing

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Boss: I need you to do a site inspection at our Elbonian facility. It's located in a disputed territory on the border of the totalitarian state of North Elbonia. Was that enough foreshadowing or should I say something about how they treat spies? Dilbert: No, you nailed it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #make copies, #mental task, #bloated cadaver, #staple or no, #asks secretary

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Asok: Our boss asked me to make some copies. But I fear doing such a menial task will brand me as unimportant." Asok: I was hoping you could make the copies for me since your career is already a bloated cadaver If I am reading your body language correctly, you are wondering 'staple or no staple?'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #presentation, #sales division, #public speaking, #scared, #fear, #stomach in mouth

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The Boss says, "Asok, I need you to help Alice give a presentation to 500 sales reps." GMPH!!! The Boss says, "Is that your stomach?" Asok says, "Yeth."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #confusion, #fear, #firings, #humor, #meeting, #panic, #downsized, #spam folder, #recession, #intern, #business

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The Boss says, "You still work here? I thought I downsized you last week." Asok says, "Um?I don't think so." The Boss says, "Check your spam folder after the meeting." Dilbert says, "First recession?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fear, #honesty, #panic, #reality, #worried, #first recession, #hopes and dreams dashed, #yank band aid

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Asok says, "This is my first recession. How worried should I be?" Wally says, "You'll be fine as long as you don't have any hopes and dreams." Asok says, "But I still have them." Wally says, "It's time to yank off that band-aid."