Good Attitude Award Comic Strips - Page 6
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1000 Results for Good Attitude Award
View 51 - 60 results for good attitude award comic strips. Discover the best "Good Attitude Award" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday November 08,
1994
Tags #donate blood, #good for society, #too comepetetive, #thirsty
Transcript
Wally and a man stand in line at the blood drive. The man says, "I don't mind donating blood . . . It's good for society . . ." The man continues, "But I'm worried that our company is getting too competitive about how much we give compared to other companies." Dilbert leaves the blood drive saying, "Man, I'm thirsty!!" His head and body have shrunk to half their normal size.
Monday December 19,
1994
Tags #quality award, #killed by sea turtle, #went snorkeling
Transcript
The Boss, Wally and Dilbert sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "The company has decided to compete for the 'Millard Bullrush Quality Award.'" Wally asks, "Bullrush? Isn't he the politician who went snorkeling and got killed by a sea turtle?" The Boss replies, "They're faster than they look." Wally says to Dilbert, "I think we can win this."
Tuesday December 20,
1994
Tags #total quality method, #bullrush award, #honesty award
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss enters and says, "Describe how you used 'total quality' methods on your last project. We're applying for the Millard Bullrush Quality Award." Dilbert says, "You know I didn't use 'total quality.' I'd have to lie." The Boss responds, "Sadly, Millard passed away before he could invent the Millard Bullrush 'Honesty' Award."
Wednesday December 21,
1994
Tags #quality award, #dishonest parts, #project lost budget, #assume project failed
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert works on a laptop and says to Dogbert, "I have to submit my project for a 'quality' award. I'll need your help on the dishonest parts." Dilbert continues, "The real story is that the project lost its budget because its acronym was similar to a project that was canceled." Dogbert says, "Assume your project would have failed and claim the savings from avoiding it." Dilbert says, "You're spooky."
Wednesday December 28,
1994
Tags #bring strangers in, #test product, #strangers are stupid, #good candy
Transcript
The Boss, Dilbert and a man with an eye patch sit at a conference table. The man says, "Sure, we could bring some strangers in to test out product for ease of use . . ." The man continues, "But that could take all afternoon and cost at least a hundred dollars." The man continues, "And all it proves is strangers are stupid." The Boss says, "Sometimes they have good candy."
Tuesday February 28,
1995
Tags #singular achievement award, #we are teams, #check, #campiagn, #one thousand dollars
Transcript
The Boss hands a check to Ted while Wally, Dilbert and Alice watch. The Boss says, "And Ted gets this 'Singular Achievement' award for creating the 'We Are Teams' campaign." The Boss continues, "It's a check for a thousand dollars! Let's all give Ted a hand." Ted walks by holding the check and Wally, Alice and Dilbert look angry. As Wally, Alice and Dilbert hit and slap Ted the Boss thinks, "These things never work the way you want them to."
Saturday April 15,
1995
Tags #stick to script, #act sincere, #forgive you, #worng, #sell key boards, #morons, #dumber than squirrels, #good writing
Transcript
The Boss stands in front of a camera and Dogbert sits in a director's chair. Dogbert hands the Boss a script and says, "Stick to the script. Act sincere and beg your customers to forgive you." The Boss looks into the camera and reads, "It was wrong for us to sell keyboards with no 'Q.' We're sorry. We're morons." Dilbert and Dogbert sit on the couch watching the Boss's television commercial. In the advertisement, the Boss says, "We're dumber than squirrels. We hear voices and do what they command. I have broccoli in my socks." Dilbert says, "Good writing." Dogbert responds, "Thanks."
Tuesday July 18,
1995
Tags #suggestions, #good idea, #doubtful of wally, #seen in book, #no confidence, #employee morale, #abilities
Transcript
The Boss, Wally and Dilbert sit around a conference table. The Boss says, "That's an interesting suggestion, Wally. But if it's a good idea, why aren't other companies doing it?" Waving his hands wildly, Wally yells angrily, "Can you imagine in your WILDEST dreams that maybe, just MAYBE I had a good idea that nobody else thought of?!!" The Boss comments, "You must have seen it in a book." Wally says, "Thanks for the confidence in my abilities." Dilbert interjects, "You read a book?"
Tuesday August 08,
1995
Tags #new dress code, #insane, #fridays are casual, #can't wear jeans, #feel good, #already own, #sadistic plot, #make people quit
Transcript
Alice stands in front of Catbert's desk. Alice says, "I don't understand your new dress code policy, Mr. Catbert." Catbert replies, "Maybe you're insane." Catbert continues, "It's simple. Fridays are 'casual.' But you can't wear blue jeans because jeans look good and feel good and you already own several pairs." Alice replies angrily, "It's another sadistic human resources plot to make people quit!!" Catbert answers, "Say hello to unsightly panty lines."
Thursday August 10,
1995
Tags #feels good, #fester and grwo, #micromanage, #plan, #self directed team, #team meetings, #full blown loathing
Transcript
The Boss stands in front of a conference table with an overhead projector on it. He points to a diagram and says, "My plan is to make you a self-directed team." Alice, Dilbert and Wally are at the table. The Boss continues, "After a few team meetings, the disrespect you have for each other will fester and grow into full-blown loathing." The Boss adds, "You'll BEG me to micro-manage you!! Ha ha ha!!" Wally comments, "It actually feels good to have a plan."