Hard Hit Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

376 Results for Hard Hit

View 51 - 60 results for hard hit comic strips. Discover the best "Hard Hit" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2001's comic on:


Tags #bad data, #data, #grossly inaccurate, #managing is hard

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "All of our data is grossly inaccurate... but I need data in order to manage." The Boss continues, "If I concentrate hard enough I can forget that the data is bad. Then I can use it." Wally and Dilbert watch as The Boss shakes with clenched teeth. Wally says, "I have to give him credit.; managing is harder than it looks."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 18, 2001's comic on:


Tags #job market, #bad job market, #how hard, #unemployed, #leader

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches from behind and asks, "How's the ol' job market lately? It's pretty bad, isn't it?" The Boss continues, "So no matter how hard I make you work it's still better than being unemployed." Dilbert turns in surprise. The Boss says, "Who's your leader? Go on, say it." Dilbert puts his head in his hands and replies quietly, "You are."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 2001's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #across bridge, #hard work, #intern, #carpool lane, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice has a briefcase in her hand. She says to Asok, "Asok, you're coming with me to an important meeting across the bridge." Asok is sitting at his computer. He thinks to himself, "Important!" Alice and Asok are walking. Asok says, "My hard work as an intern is paying off. Already I am invited to an important meeting!" Alice and Asok are driving past traffic. Asok exclaims, "Hey, we get the carpool lane!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 29, 2001's comic on:


Tags #hard work, #nights, #weekends, #demand 10 percent

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice is sitting at her computer. She looks thoroughly disheveled. The Boss says to her, "Alice, all of your hard work - the nights and the weekends - are finally paying off." The Boss continues, "We increased our five-year forecast of demand by ten percent!" Alice responds, "You changed a wild guess by ten percent?" The Boss replies, "Thanks to you!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 22, 2002's comic on:


Tags #dilebrt the sales guy, #mother, #overpirced, #hard to use, #spit, #packaging, #mom, #surprised, #mother and son, #Family

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Dilbert the Sales Guy. Dilbert's mom is holding his product. She says, "I wouldn't buy this @#!%!!& with YOUR money." Dilbert's mom continues, "It's overpriced, hard to use, full of bugs and it solves no problem." Dilbert's mom continues, "I spit on your packaging!" Dilbert responds, "Um.. Mom.."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 04, 2002's comic on:


Tags #tech support, #software is worn, #typing too hard, #decaf, #paint walls, #stop gym, #holistic tec support, #read more

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Dogbert Tech Support. Dogbert is talking into a telephone headset. He says, "Your software is worn out. You must be typing too hard." Dogbert continues, "Switch to decaf, paint your walls pink and stop going to the gym." Dilbert approaches Dogbert and says, "I've never heard of holistic tech support." Dogbert replies, "Maybe you should read more."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 11, 2002's comic on:


Tags #fix interface, #million dollars, #close eyes, #wish hard, #saving

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert points to a slide and says, "We can fix our incomprehensible user interface for a million dollars." Dilbert continues, "Or we can close our eyes and wish real hard that our users won't care." The Boss closes his eyes and wishes real hard. Wally turns to Alice and says, "He's saving a million dollars. What did you do today?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 02, 2002's comic on:


Tags #code, #projects expenses, #assigns codes, #breaking hard

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to a coworker, "And I need a code for charging my project's expenses." The coworker says, "No. I hate your project." Dilbert responds, "It doesn't matter if you hate it. You're just the guy who assigns codes." The coworker motions to the door and says, "Get out of here." Dilbert asks, "Why is everything in this company so freakin' hard?" The coworker replies, "Because of people like you."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 09, 2003's comic on:


Tags #body double, #despots, #most successful, #double, #take hit, #personal dress code, #dress intern

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on The Boss' desk and says, "You need a body double. They're popular with your most successful despots." Dogbert continues, "If someone tries to ambush you into making a decision, the double will take the hit." The Boss approaches Asok with a pointy-haired hat in his hands and says, "I want you to think of this as your own personal dress code."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 06, 2003's comic on:


Tags #senior management knows, #key employees, #hard imes, #bonuses, #black mailing themselves, #sound bad, #huge retention

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss addresses a meeting, "Senior management knows they need to retain key employees during hard times." The Boss continues, "That's why they're giving themselves huge retention bonuses." Alice responds, "So, they're blackmailing themselves?" The Boss says, "You can make anything sound bad."