Learn New Technology Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Learn New Technology

View 51 - 60 results for learn new technology comic strips. Discover the best "Learn New Technology" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 25, 2014's comic on:


Tags #graphic design, #graphic designers, #outsourcing, #new employee, #subcontract, #starngers, #internet, #5% salary, #undermind, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Dilbert, meet our new graphic designer. Dilbert: If I had your job, I would secretly sub it out to strangers on the Internet and pay them 5% of my salary while I did nothing all day. Oops, sorry. I didn't know you were already there.

Nano Robots Are The New Health Plan

Thank you for voting.
Nano Robots Are The New Health Plan - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 27, 2015's comic on:


Tags #technology, #robots, #invention, #health, #big business, #corporation, #nanobot

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: We're replacing the employee health plan with nanorobot technology. We'll insert tiny medical robots into their lower digestive tracts to keep them healthy forever. Boss: So, our plan is to shove robots up... CEO: Only until the robots can replace them.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 17, 2016's comic on:


Tags #technology, #learning, #education, #tutorial, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I love living in a world where everything I need to know is on the Internet. I'll just hop over to YouTube and learn how to use my new app. Perfect! I can choose from over a hundred different tutorials! It will only take me an hour or so to figure out which one refers to my version of the software. Narrator: One hour later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! These videos are poorly labeled! Narrator: Two hours later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! This guy talks too slowly! Get to the point! Narrator: Three hours later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! Why are my menu options different from the tutorial? I hate living in a world where everything I need to know is on the Internet.

New Website Developer

Thank you for voting.
New Website Developer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 17, 2016's comic on:


Tags #web, #internet, #site, #development, #code, #time, #deadline, #coding, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our website developer quit one week before the site was scheduled to be finished. But I hired a new one so we can finish on time. Dilbert: Apparently, you have never met a website developer before. Boss: So, you will be done in about a week, right? Developer: It will take me a month just to throw away the last guy's code.

Introducing The New Hire

Thank you for voting.
Introducing The New Hire - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 31, 2018's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #new hire, #names, #introduction

View Transcript

Transcript

The New Hire New Hire: Can you take me around the office and introduce me? The Boss: No, that scheme won't work because it requires me to admit I don't know most of their names. New Hire: What's my name? The Boss: Um... Does it start with a letter?

New Year Resolution

Thank you for voting.
New Year Resolution  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 2018's comic on:


Tags #holidays, #new year, #sarcasm, #weight, #new year's resolutions

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: Do you have any New Year's resolutions? Dilbert: I resolve to not make major decisions about my life based on random calendar dates. Carol: So...nothing about your weight? Dilbert: Worst holiday ever.

Sean From Extreme Marketing

Thank you for voting.
Sean From Extreme Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 22, 2019's comic on:


Tags #extreme, #marketing, #sean, #brainwashing, #technology, #unapprove, #first

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: This is Sean from the extreme marketing department. He's here to tell us about our new brainwashing technology. Dilbert: I don't approve of brainwashing. Sean: That's why I'm going to do you first.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 25, 2011's comic on:


Tags #deception, #managers & supervisors, #learn from mistakes, #make alits, #wrong this year, #coincidence, #perfromance reviews, #management legends, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "We can learn from our mistakes. Let's make a list of the things that each of you did wrong this year." Dilbert says, "It is just a coincidence that our annual performance reviews are due next week?" The Boss says, "It would have been the stuff of management legends." Catbert says, "Very nice try."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 26, 2011's comic on:


Tags #prejudice, #universities & colleges, #updating employee profiles, #school. indian institute of technology, #double major, #engineering, #false humility, #combined thesis, #terraformed planet

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol says, "Hey, Asok. I'm updating our employee profiles. Where'd you go to school?" Asok says, "I graduated from the Indian Institute of Technology in Lucknow with a double major in engineering and physics, and a minor in false humility." Asok says, "For my combined thesis I terraformed a planet in another dimension and didn't tell anyone." Carol says, "I'll put 'Indian.'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 12, 2011's comic on:


Tags #computers & peripherals, #fraternization, #friends with ghots, #ghandi, #ghost personal page, #ghosts, #heaven, #internet & world wide web, #llincoln, #satellite pictures, #social media, #social network, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Our new product will be a social network for people who want to be friends with ghosts. We'll post satellite pictures on each ghost's personal page and say the photos were taken from heaven. Man: Abraham Lincoln posted new pictures. Woman: I'm chatting with Gandhi! Later.