Obliviousness Comic Strips - Page 6

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122 Results for Obliviousness

View 51 - 60 results for obliviousness comic strips. Discover the best "Obliviousness" comics from Dilbert.com.

Boss And Social Media

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Boss And Social Media - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags social media, twitter, facebook, passion, deception, trick, prank, obliviousness, technology

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Boss: I don't get social media. How do I get followers? Wally: Easy. People care about passion. Find something you hate and write about it. Boss: Well, I don't like children. Wally: Perfect. And don't hold back.

Doomed Smartwatch Project

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Doomed Smartwatch Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags analogy, obliviousness, assignment, technology, invention, watch, failure

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Boss: You'll be in charge of our smart watch project. Dilbert: ...that is doomed from the start. Boss: Stop being such a pessimist. Dilbert: Said General Custer to his horse. Boss: Why would he talk to his horse? Dilbert: Because even the horse knew something was wrong!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ideas, problems, talking, solution, obliviousness, criticism, honesty

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Boss: Why didn't you tell me our biggest vendor pulled out of the deal? Dilbert: If I told you my problems, you would suggest solutions. Your solutions generally don't make sense. But you are my boss, so I would be obliged to waste time looking into your suggestions. So if you try to solve my problem, I will have two problems instead of one. Boss: Sometimes my ideas are good! Right? Dilbert: That is a dangerous way to think.

Wally's Hobby

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Wally's Hobby - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags compliment, insult, backhanded compliment, hobby, obliviousness, deception

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Wally: Your strategy looks like a genius way to fight the last war. Boss: Thank you. Wally: No problem. You owe me a compliment. At what point does insulting your boss and getting away with it count as a hobby?

Buy One Elbonian

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Buy One Elbonian - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags slave, slaves, slavery, owner, obliviousness, nuance, help, maid, maids, servant, servants, semantics

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Alice: I hear you're a slave owner now. CEO: That is unfair. I buy a few Elbonians on the Internet and suddenly I'm the "slave owner" guy. Alice: You are literally an owner of slaves. CEO: I prefer to think of them as bad negotiators.

How The Elbonians Spun It

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How The Elbonians Spun It - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags slavery, slave, slaves, semantics, owner, ownership, obliviousness, wages, money, pay, payment

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Dilbert: How's it going with the Elbonians you bought on the Internet? CEO: I had to set them free. Turns out it was slavery after all. Dilbert: You made them work without pay. CEO: Yeah, that's the spin they put on it, too.

Trust Yourself

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Trust Yourself - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags motivation, inspiration, logic, obliviousness, Advice, executives, motivational speaking

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CEO: The key to success is trusting yourself. Alice: Even when you're wrong? CEO: I'm starting to think motivation isn't a thing.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, credit, motivation, obliviousness, hiring, logic, business

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Boss: The secret to success is hiring the right people. Dilbert: Then why doesn't everyone do that? Boss: It takes a lot of skill to hire the right people. Dilbert: Did you just find a way to take all of the credit for the team's success? And did you do it in a clever way that was intended to make you look humble even while hogging all the credit? Boss: I also motivate you. Dilbert: You're money?

Ceo's Yacht

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Ceo's Yacht - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hypocrisy, money, salary, wages, net worth, rich people, yacht, obliviousness, saving, cost

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CEO: We must learn to do more with less. Alice: You own a yacht that has an 18-hole golf course, and a landing strip for your jet, and its own zip code. CEO: I got a good deal on that. Alice: That's what the idiot that buys it form you will say, too.

Next Robot Will Be Intelligent

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Next Robot Will Be Intelligent - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ai, artificial intelligence, insult, intelligence, obliviousness, robot, stupid

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Boss: Our next robot release will have the intelligence of a human! Dilbert: Will it have intelligence in the same way you do? Boss: What are you implying? Dilbert: I'll bet the robot wouldn't know either.