Pawn In The Game Comic Strips - Page 6
59 Results for Pawn In The Game
View 51 - 59 results for pawn in the game comic strips. Discover the best "Pawn In The Game" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share September 30, 2007's comic on:
Alice: "What are you doing?" Dilbert: "Carpet fishing." "It's a sport I invented." "I divided the carpet in my cubicle into a numbered grid." "Then I wrote a computer program that randomly picks a carpet location and a type of fish about once an hour." "If it picks the carpet location where I happen to be dangling this string, it means I hooked a fish." "Yesterday I caught a marlin." "Did you come here for some reason other than to spoil the salmon run?"
Share May 28, 2006's comic on:
"Here's a game card that gives you a chance to win groceries." "No thanks. Just take a penny off my bill and we'll call it even." "Um...I can't do that." "Why not? Isn't that game card worth a penny?" "We don't have a procedure." "How's that my problem?" "Look, maybe you could eat something that's worth a penny and I'll look the other way." "How about a grape? I like grapes." "It would have to be one that's been on the floor." "It tasted like victory."
Share September 07, 2003's comic on:
Man: You never responded to my urgent request for engineering resources. The Boss: "What?" Man: "I told Alice to ask you!" The Boss: "She must have forgotten." Alice: "I sent you three e-mail messages." The Boss: "You know I don't have time to read my e-mail." Alice: "And I sent you a voicemail." The Boss: "You know I don't have time for voice-mails." Alice: "That's why I also.." "Tatooed it on your stinkin' chest!!!" The Boss: "As if I have time to read my torso."
Share July 29, 2013's comic on:
Catbert: Your first test on the management fast track involves rescuing a plastic baby and a bag of money from a weasel. You must punch the weasel then catch the money and the baby before they reach the ground. I found our next CEO. Wally: Wait...say this instructions again.
Share September 03, 2016's comic on:
Alice: Why didn't you tell me about this sooner? Dilbert: That's a fool's game because Zeno's Paradox says there will always be a time sooner than the one I pick. Alice's Paradox says that no matter how many criticisms you explain away, there are always plenty more.
Share October 14, 2016's comic on:
Boss: Alice doesn't want to be my work-wife. How about you? Tina; As your work-wife, would I be able to jokingly insult you in front of the others? Boss: Sure, ha ha! Tina: Okay, I'm in. Now run along, you ignorant sack of wet fertilizer. Boss: This is fun!
Share August 18, 2017's comic on:
Wally: Meetings used to be frustrating and boring until I gamified that situation. Now I try to win meetings by criticizing co-workers offering no ideas of my own, and leaving without any new task. Dilbert: You call that winning? Wally: Compared to my victims, yes.
Share June 05, 2018's comic on:
Dilbert: I told our boss his presentation had a low signal-to-noise ratio and he thought it was a compliment. Wally: I think you just invented my new favorite game. Working for you is like boiling an ocean. Boss: Thank you!
Share December 23, 2018's comic on:
Boss: The job market is so tight that I had to hire this NPC. Dilbert: NPC? Boss: Non-player character. It's a video game term for a character that is programmed.As opposed to being an avatar for a human player. An NPC has limited programmed responses. Watch this. How's your day going? NPC: Not bad for a Monday. Boss: Can you help me on my project? NPC: I am too busy: Boss: What do you think of management? NPC: They are all dumb. Wally: I just bonded with that thing. Boss: See how fast you get used to it?