Pelt With Office Supplies Comic Strips - Page 6

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View 51 - 60 results for pelt with office supplies comic strips. Discover the best "Pelt With Office Supplies" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #funny in purple, #important decsions, #missile defense networks, #naps, #french people, #touching with cigarette

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Dilbert enters the Boss' office and asks, "Is it okay if I take naps during the day?" Dilbert then asks, "Or would you prefer that I make important decisions while groggy and delusional?" Dilbert continues, "Either way is okay with me. It's your call." The Boss doesn't respond and Dilbert leaves his office thinking, "He looks funny all purple." Back at his desk and half asleep, Dilbert thinks to himself "Must...stay...awake. Make...important...decisions." Dilbert continues, "Must replace optical switches with dancing lemurs." The Boss stands behind Dilbert as he sleeps. Now in an obvious dream state, Dilbert yells in his sleep "Gaaa! French people are touching me with cigarettes!" The Boss leaves Dilbert's cubicle thinking, "I hope that's how engineers design missile defense networks."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #crimes, #revenge, #difficult co workers, #jerks, #jar of polonium, #deal with difficulty, #office, #Politics, #registered, #dog, #stool, #animals

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Dogbert: Today you'll learn how to deal with difficult co-workers. Jerks will always be jerks. Your only hope is to kill them in ways that are untraceable. Boss: We need to talk. Dogbert: Each of you got a jar of polonium when you registered.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #criminals, #office workers, #work ethic, #cesspool, #horrible office conditions, #better choices, #career criminal

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Dilbert: What's your son doing here? Coworker: Today is 'Bring Your Kid To The Cesspool Day." The idea is to show kids how horrible it is to work in an office. That way, they can make better choices and avoid a life like ours. Dilbert: Just out of curiosity, who told you this is "Bring Your Kid To The Cesspool Day?" Coworker: Wally. Oh. Child: I've decided to become a career criminal. Dilbert: Good luck with all of that.

New Office Layout Will Improve Efficiency

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New Office Layout Will Improve Efficiency - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #layout, #office, #desk, #work environment, #efficiency, #catch-22, #loophole, #laziness, #excuse

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Wally: Do you really believe that your plan to change the office layout will boost efficiency? Boss: Of course it will. The physical environment makes a huge difference. Wally: Good. I missed all of my deadlines because of our current office layout is bad.

Tina's Office Romance Not A Secret

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Tina's Office Romance Not A Secret - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #secret, #relationship, #dating, #clues, #sleuting, #loud, #shouting, #relationships

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Alice: How's your office romance with Loud Howard coming along? Tina: How did you hear about us? Alice: He's loud and you're always covered with his spittle. Tina: I was hoping it looked like perspiration.

Open Office Plan Failed

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Open Office Plan Failed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office, #office workers, #cubicle, #change, #mistake, #admission, #hubris

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Dilbert: Our transition to an open office plan has been a huge failure. Too many distractions. How can we change back to cubicles and private offices without looking like idiots? Are you listening to me? Boss: Is someone nursing a baby over there?

Boss Wants Private Office

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Boss Wants Private Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cubicle, #office, #office workers, #privacy, #open office

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Boss: The employees are complaining because our new open office plan has too many distractions. CEO: You want to go back to cubicles? Boss: No, I just need a private so I can't hear them complaining.

Two Choices For Work Space

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Two Choices For Work Space - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office, #office workers, #cubicle, #distraction, #work from home

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Boss: We're trying to decide if it's better to have an open office plan with too many distractions to be productive... or soul-crushing cubicles that will make every employee envy the dead. Dilbert: Maybe everyone can just work from home? Boss: And miss all of this?

Soaring With The Eagles

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Soaring With The Eagles - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #inspiration

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Boss: The inspirational poster I put in the break room isn't working. I asked around and no one is soaring with the eagles. Catbert: Is the poster defective? Boss: That's the only explanation that makes sense.

Working With Old Ned

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Working With Old Ned - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #elderly, #men and women, #office workers, #old

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Boss: I need you to work with old Ned on this project. He's a little bit old-fashioned, but don't let that get to you. He retires in six months. Alice: I've been asked to work with you. Ned: Women have jobs now? ? ?