Person Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

221 Results for Person

View 51 - 60 results for person comic strips. Discover the best "Person" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 24, 2014's comic on:


Tags #costumes, #deception, #downtrodden employee, #awesome person in disguise, #spider eggs, #bosses coffee, #survive, #learned, #knowledge is over rated

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Hello, downtrodden employee. I am one of you, and not an awesome person in disguise. Carol: I put spider eggs in my boss's coffee in the hope that some survive and burrow out of his body. Catbert: What have you learned so far? Boss: I learned that knowledge is overrated.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 04, 2014's comic on:


Tags #inventions, #thinking, #product ideas, #billion dollar ideas, #unwilling, #corporation, #dumb person idea, #pretend, #drone that attacks, #wooden screen phone

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Does anyone have any billion-dollar product ideas? Dilbert: There's a logical problem with that question. If I had a billion-dollar idea, I would quit this job and start my own company. Only a dumb person would give you his best idea for free. And the best idea from a dumb person is still dumb. But I am willing to give you some ideas that are too lame for my own use. Boss: Can you at least pretend to suggest good ideas? Dilbert: Sure. How about a phone with a wooden screen? Wally: How about a drone that attacks anyone who looks at it?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 19, 2014's comic on:


Tags #lying, #non disclosure agreement, #disbelief, #wrong person, #mighty judgy, #so many secrets

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I need you to sign a non-disclosure agreement before we start. Wally: We don't need that because no one believes a word I say anyway. Man: Maybe I'm meeting with the wrong person. Wally: You're mighty judgy for a guy with so many secrets.

Copersons

Thank you for voting.
Copersons - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 17, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #correct, #co-worker, #work, #co-person, #leech

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: What is the correct name for a co-worker who doesn't do any actual work? I'm thinking "co-person," or possibly just, "leech." Wally: Are we working right now? Dilbert: Good point, co-person.

Appearing In Photos

Thank you for voting.
Appearing In Photos - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 12, 2020's comic on:


Tags #co-workers, #technology, #social media, #friends, #Opinion, #abhor, #person, #characteristics, #jerk

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: i can't be your friend because i saw a disturbing photo of you on social media. you were in a group photo with a person whose opinions i abhor. dilbert: can you explain why that makes me a bad person? tina: sure. duh. when you appear in photos with other people, you acquire their bad characteristics. dilbert: i don't think that's how it works. tina: that's exactly how it works! one photo with a jerk makes you a jerk! case closed! dilbert taking selfie with Tina in background: smile. tina upset: no-ooo!!!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 2011's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #managers & supervisors, #couldn't be worse, #bad idea, #Funny, #project is bad idea, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "How's everything going?" Dilbert says, "It couldn't be worse." Dilbert says, "I was the only person who said this project is a bad idea. Then you assigned it to me." The Boss says, "It's funnier when I make them say it." Dilbert says, "Grrrr"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 14, 2011's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #frustration, #idea, #never work, #reject hypothesis, #self doubt

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Your idea will never work. Dilbert: At what point did you reject the hypothesis that you're too dumb to understand how good the idea is? I'm becoming even less of a people person.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 06, 2012's comic on:


Tags #monsters, #office equipment, #email servers, #ancestral hime, #reduce expenses, #data vampires, #exagerration, #fiber optic

View Transcript

Transcript

I.T. person: I moved our email servers to my ancestral home of Transylbonia to reduce expenses. You might have heard rumors that all Transylbonians are data vampires, but I assure you it's an exaggeration. There's this one guy, Doug..." Transylbonian: Dude! It's fiber-optic! Doug: It's really not my thing.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 07, 2012's comic on:


Tags #computers & peripherals, #office equipment, #email servers, #inbox, #vowels only, #complain, #loudest, #complain to boss

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Ever since you moved our email servers to Transylbonia, my inbox has nothing but vowels. I.T. person: We I.T. people only respond to whoever complains loudest. You should complain to your bosss. Dilbert: I will! Boss' Computer: A ui aoe uie ou eai!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 10, 2012's comic on:


Tags #happiness, #marriage, #interpretation, #annoying, #soul mate, #perceptive, #psychology, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Someday, I want to get married because studies show that married people are happier. Dilbert: A smarter interpretation is that no one wants to marry an unhappy person. Tina: You're annoying. Dilbert: With any luck, your soul mate won't be perceptive.