Project Review Meeting Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Project Review Meeting

View 51 - 60 results for project review meeting comic strips. Discover the best "Project Review Meeting" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #produce breakthrough, #meeting, #coach me, #higher perfromance, #no hope for progress, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My project has no progress and no hope for progress. I scheduled a meeting is I can fantasize that it will produce a breakthrough. I recommend that we have a meeting next week so you can fantasize that your'll coach me to higher levels of performance. The Boss: Sounds good.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #great 3 hour meeting, #strategic core issues, #gibberish

View Transcript

Transcript

It's been a great three-hour meeting but I have one question. Can a business - led project management process optimize our static core issues? Was that gibberish? I thought thats what we are doing.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cross charging, #freshly brewed coffee, #tempting pasteries, #time to project, #meeting, #wrong meeting, #mis placed, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Um...Why are you here? "Originally I was seduced by the smell of your freshly brewed coffee and tempting pastries." "But now I'm all about cross-charging my time to your project."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #project wombat, #project manager, #inviting me, #expertise, #knowledge of expertise

View Transcript

Transcript

Yesterday I had a great meeting about Project Wombat. "What?!" "I've been managing that project for six months! How can you have a meeting without inviting me?!!" "Have you noticed that meetings go smoother without any knowledge or expertise?" "Kinda."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #late, #chronically late, #pre meeting, #trick, #chronic lateness, #power, #selfish, #bad attitude, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Let's meet before the project meeting to go over a few things. Coworker: Nice try. We chronically late people know when we're being played. Your pre-meeting is a trick to get me to show up on time for the real meeting. But that won't work because poor planning isn't the cause of my chronic lateness. I make people wait for me because I enjoy the power and I don't care about anyone's feelings. Dilbert: Fine. I'll see you at the project meeting at ten. Coworker: Nice try. I know the meeting is at 10:30. Dilbert: How do you keep a job? Coworker: That attitude is exactly why I don't like people.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #victor, #project, #smooth, #no problems, #yell, #angry, #upset, #mouth open, #goat head, #patient, #apologize, #business, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Are you having any problems taking over Victor's project?" Dilbert says, "Nope. Smooth sailing so far." Asok says, "Smooth??? It gave me a goat head!!!" Dilbert says, "He asked if I had any problems. Wait for your turn, Asok." Asok says, "Sorry."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #math, #project, #fail, #disaster, #embarrassed, #act dumb, #cancel, #buy, #question, #demonstrate, #hands up, #education, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "The math clearly shows that our project won't work, even if we do everything right." The Boss says, "It's embarrassing to cancel a project in the middle. Let's act dumb and hope someone in upper management cancels it for budget reasons." Dilbert says, "Should I stop buying stuff?" The Boss says, "You should buy twice as much."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #project, #coordinate, #give up, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Make sure you coordinate with the brand manager and the category manager." The Boss says, "And also the clients, the account execs, the project leaders, strategic planning, facilities management, product managers, marketing, and I.T." Dilbert says, "All I heard was 'give up.'" The Boss says, "Let's meet again in a year."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sitting, #meeting, #explaining, #project, #annoyed, #angry, #lazy, #wasting, #time, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "I spent the first part of the week installing our new productivity software." Wally says, "Then I used the rest of the week trying to make it interface with our time reporting system." Wally says, "So far all it can do is tell me how much time I'm wasting in this meeting."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #asking, #project, #procrastination, #excuses, #blame, #distraction, #annoyed, #frustrated, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "Wally, you didn't e-mail me your project status." Wally says, "Did you check your spam folder?" Wally says, "Maybe you should check there before you besmirch my good name with your baseless accusations." The Boss says, "Did you send it?" Wally says, "Okay, I see how you're trying to turn this around."