Say It A Certain Way Comic Strips - Page 6

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View 51 - 60 results for say it a certain way comic strips. Discover the best "Say It A Certain Way" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #most evil way, #database, #customer information, #sell mailing list, #spam, #balckmail, #data bse, #clumping

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The Boss says to Catbert, "What's the most evil way to use our database of customer information? The Boss says, "Should we sell our mailing lists, spam without mercy, or just blackmail customers?" Catbert says, "Um... Do you have me in that database?" The Boss says, "We know all about your clumping problems."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #staying real, #keeping to core, #good, #duuude, #say thing, #no meaning

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A male employee says to Dilbert, "Dilbert, my man, you're stayin' real and keepin' to the core." Dilbert asks, "Is that good?" The employee says, "I don't even know what it means." Dilbert asks, "Why do you say things that have no meaning?" The employee answers, "Du-u-u-de!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new things to say, #fill airtime, #let other people talk

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Dilbert and Wally stand having coffee. Wally says, "I'm running out of new things to say." Wally continues, "I'll have to start repeating myself just to fill the airtime." Dilbert replies, "You could let other people talk." Wally continues, "So, anyway, I'm running out of new things to say."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #team work, #natures way, #identify weak, #perpetuating genes, #negative spin, #boss puts spin

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The Boss is sitting at his desk. Wally addresses him, "Teamwork is nature's way of identifying the weak." Wally continues, "The strong, such as myself, put all of our energy into perpetuating our genes." Wally concludes, "Now this is when you usually try to put a negative spin on everything."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stretch goals, #signaling surrender, #no to doughnut

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The Boss addresses a meeting, "Starting today, our goals will be replaced by stretch goals." Asok asks, "Stretch goals?" Alice says, "Stretch goals are like stretch pants. It's a way of signaling surrender." Asok puts up both arms in surrender. Alice says, "Speaking of which, I wouldn't say no to a doughnut."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #elbonia, #meeting, #no limo servoce, #cheapest way, #brownies barrel service, #business

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Dilbert is still in a barrel. The Boss says to him, "I'm sending you to Elbonia for a meeting, but we're on a tight budget." The Boss, also in a barrel, continues, "So there will be no limo service to the airport. Go there in the cheapest way possible." A bear rolls Dilbert in his barrel down the highway. The bear says, "And then I started Brownie's Barrel Service." Dilbert thinks, "He's a talker."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #highest profit margin, #entire industry, #not supposed to say, #customers

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The Boss says in a meeting, "We have the highest profilt margin in our entire industy!" Alice leans over and whispers something to The Boss. The Boss says, "Apparently I'm not supposed to say that in front of customers."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fooglepoopillion, #embarrased, #tell the truth, #best policy, #honesty, #what you say

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Dilbert is at home. He says to Dogbert, "My company lost a frooglepoopillion dollars. I'm embarrassed to tell people where I work." Dogbert responds, "Never be afraid to tell the truth about yourself." Dilbert asks, "Because honesty is the best policy?" Dogbert replies, "Because no one pays any attention to what you say."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #criticize things, #dont understnd, #kyoto treaty, #flat tax, #unfair, #stem cells

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Dogbert: I've decided to spend more time criticizing things I don't understand. I say we should flat-tax the kyoto treaty all the way back to the security council, Dilbert: wouldn't that be unfair to stem cells? Dogbert: Bah!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #process of getting approval, #hard way, #meeting, #no direct answers, #business

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The man who couldn't give direct answers. Alice: "Did you ask your boss for approval?" Man: "Now i will explain the process for getting approval." Alice: "Do you want to do this the hard way?" Man: "First, you ask for a meeting."