# Statistical Analysis Comic Strips - Page 6

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## 59 Results for Statistical Analysis

View 51 - 59 results for statistical analysis comic strips. Discover the best "Statistical Analysis" comics from Dilbert.com.

### Sunday November 26, 2000

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#### Transcript

Dilbert, putting a paper on The Boss' desk, says to The Boss, "My analysis shows that your pet project isn't feasible." The Boss says to Dilbert, "Try working the numbers." Dilbert says, "That wouldn't change the underlying reality." The Boss asks, "What if we massaged the numbers?" Dilbert says, "Massaging the numbers means the same thing as working the numbers." Dilbert says to The Boss, "You can't make the impossible possible by hallucinating new numbers." Dilbert asks The Boss, "Do you have any other ideas?" The Boss says to Dilbert, "That depends on the the phrase 'fiddle with the numbers' means."

### Monday January 27, 2014

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Catbert: Our big data analysis tells us that only the top performers leave for higher pay. Since you're still here, it means your performance is average at best. Dilbert: That's not fair! Catbert: That's what all the average people say.

### Monday January 05, 2015 Dating Is A B Testing

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Woman: Have you been dating a lot? Dilbert: I call it A-B testing. I go on dates and then compare the analytics to see who I click with most.Woman: What exactly are you measuring? Dilbert: Asks too many questions.

### Thursday March 24, 2016 Boss Uses His Gut

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Boss: Your analysis does not conform to my preconceived notions. So my gut instinct is telling me that you are wrong. Dilbert: When your gut talks to you, what does it use for a mouth?

### Monday September 12, 2016 Not Knowing The Difference Monday

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Dilbert: Do you want the detailed analysis you won't understand... or the executive summary that is dangerously misleading? Boss: I want an executive summary that is not misleading. Dilbert: I'll count on you not knowing the difference.

### Monday November 28, 2016 World's Saddest Club

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Man: Can you get that analysis to me by Tuesday? Alice: Yes, if I do it poorly. Alternately, I can do it well and miss your deadline by a week. Man: That gives me no path to success. Alice: Welcome to the world's saddest club.

### Sunday June 21, 2020 Two Bad Options

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Dilbert: I analyzed our only two options. One option costs too much, and the other option is impossible. Boss: Let's do the impossible one. Dilbert: Perhaps you can explain your reasoning. Boss: According to you, we will fail either way. But if we fail in a slow and inexpensive way, no one will even notice for months. With any luck, we'll have a corporate reorganization that forever hides our gross incompetence. Dilbert: Have you done this before? Boss: Every six months.

### Wednesday June 10, 2020 Hate Edits

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Dilbert: I didn't like your analysis, so I made some hate-edits. Man: What's a hate-edit? Dilbert: You'll see. Man: You changed "in my opinion" to "according to the squirrels in my skull." Dilbert: There you go.

### Thursday June 11, 2020 Better Fast Than Good

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Dilbert: I got your email, but I didn't have time to include your upgrades on my analysis. It's better to be timely than right because our boss can't judge the quality of our work, but he knows when it's late. Alice: Why is it that everything true is also sad? Dilbert: That's how the truth works.