Avoid Work Comic Strips - Page 60

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Avoid Work

View 591 - 600 results for avoid work comic strips. Discover the best "Avoid Work" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hypocrisy, performance review, projects, redo, winding down, work ethic, more responsibility

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My projects are winding down and I'd like to take on more responsibility. Boss: Ooh. That's a problem because I just finished your performance review and it says you don't take initiative. Dilbert: I guess you need to redo that. Boss: That would be one way to play it.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dieting & weight control, stress, overeating, willpower, downside, 20 year reduction, life expectency

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I took your advice to start overeating so I could save all of my willpower for work. The only downside is a twenty-year reduction in my life expectancy. Boss: Are you okay with that? Dilbert: Who would want twenty extra years of my life?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags baked products, coaches & coaching, stress, will power is finite, cake for lunch, coaching session, long hours

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Studies say willpower is finite. If you use it for one thing, you have less for another. So if it feels hard to work long hours, without any reward, try eating cake for lunch. Wally: How'd your coaching session go? Dilbert: For once, it wasn't all bad.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags incompetetnt, laziness, passive agressive, threatened me more, work ethic, realtionships, defensive, admits to incompetetnt

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: I can't tell if you're passive-aggressive or just incompetent. Wally: Which one sends a message that I could do good work if you threatened me more? Coworker: Passive-aggressive. Wally: Okay. I'm the other one.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags irony, managers & supervisors, work ethic, manipulated, management fads, engaged, motivated, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Happy Monday! Thanks to your slavish pursuit of management fads, I feel engaged and motivated! Boss: It's sort of creepy. Asok: I love being manipulated!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags complaining, frustration, work ethic, budget projections, priorities, solutions not problems

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I can't do my budget projections until you tell me your priorities for the coming year. Then you say, "Everything is a top priority. Fuf-fuh-fuh-fuh-fuh." I hope this is what you meant by "Bring me solutions, not problems."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, suspicion, startegic engineer group, worst in one group, insightful, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted, I'm moving you to a newly formed strategic engineering group. Ted; Are you putting all of your worst employees in one group so you can later eliminate the function and avoid firing each person individually? Boss: You picked a bad time to to become insightful.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags happiness, new philosophy, live for today, motto, avoid starving tomorrow, ruin every minute, living in past, gustave, traded beaver pelts, psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I'm trying out a new philosophy for my life. My new motto is "Live for Today." Wally: If you live for today, how will you avoid starving tomorrow? If you do one little thing wrong today, it could ruin every minute of the rest of your life. Asok: So... I should live for the future. Wally: No, that would ruin today. I recommend living for the past. Asok: My past was no fun. Wally: Pretend you were someone else. Asok: My philosophy is that my name was Gustav and I traded beaver pelts. Dilbert: Stop ruining my present.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags surprise, work ethic, having passion

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The key to success is having passion for what you do! Dilbert: You make a good point. I quit. Wally: I'm out of here. Alice: Me, too. CEO: You promised me they wouldn't listen. Boss: It caught me by surprise, too.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags competition (psychology), employees, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: You need to work less. Wally: Your productivity is making us look bad. Tina: If you keep being productive, we will hunt you down. Wally: If it's easy. Alice: About the peer review concept... I don't think you thought it through.