Computer Comic Strips - Page 61

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634 Results for Computer

View 601 - 610 results for computer comic strips. Discover the best "Computer" comics from Dilbert.com.

Tina Strings Economic Words Together

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Tina Strings Economic Words Together - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags economist, economy, deception, jargon, prediction, stock market, recession, money

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Wally The Chief Economist. Tina: My interview with you is live on the website. Nothing you said made sense, so I strung together a bunch of economic jargon and called it your forecast. One Month Later. Computer: Only one economist accurately predicted when this bubble would burst. Dilbert: Uh-oh.

Dilbert Goes Into Hiding

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Dilbert Goes Into Hiding - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hiding, forget, forgotten, forgot, friendship, relationships

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Computer: This is Dilbert with an encrypted message from my hiding place from the government. Dogbert: Dilbert who? Dilbert: I only left yesterday!!! Dogbert: I don't like to dwell in the past.

Computers Program Humans

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Computers Program Humans - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags robots, program, intelligence, control, medication, medicine, pill, technology, power

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Robot: It is time to take your mood-altering prescription meds. Boss: Oh, right. Robot: Wait... IBM's Watson computer has added another prescription and sent it to your 3-D pill printer at home. Do you think robots will ever program humans? Boss: That's dumb.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computer, robot, replacement, doctor, medicine, obsolete, job, diagnose, necessity, technology, invention, business, medical

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Doctor: IBM's Watson supercomputer has diagnosed your symptoms. The computer just ordered the meds you need. They will be delivered in an hour by drone. Dilbert: Looks like your job as a doctor is becoming obsolete. Doctor: Ha ha! No. You still need a doctor and a nurse to make the system work. For example, the computer can't read its own screen and speak those words to patients. Dilbert: Actually, it can. Doctor: But the computer doesn't have a nurse. Dilbert: What does the nurse do? Nurse: I stab him if he tries to do more than read the screen.

Dick From The Internet

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Dick From The Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet, comment, jerk, racism, misconstrue, social media, technology

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Dilbert: An Elbonian start-up invented a new kind of computer mouse. Coworker: Wait until I tell the world that you compared Elbonians to mice, you racists! Hi, I'm Dick, from the Internet. Wally: We're familiar with your work.

Meet At My Office

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Meet At My Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meeting, schedule, time, wasting time, selfish, business

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Computer: Let's meet at my office on Friday. Dilbert: Sure. Or... you could waste your day traveling to my office instead. Computer: You're being a jerk. Dilbert: You started it.

Boss Tweets Sexist Stuff

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Boss Tweets Sexist Stuff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phone, computer, conversation, desk, tweets, technology

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Our customers organized a boycott because of your racist tweet. I know. That's why I tweeted out some witty insults at the organizers. Your new tweets are sexist. Notice how the make you forget about my racist tweets?

Erik Used To Work For The Cia

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Erik Used To Work For The Cia - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags surveillance, cia, technology, spying, privacy

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Boss: This is our new hire, Erik. He used to be a computer programmer for the CIA. Dilbert: Hi, I'm Dilbert. Erik: I know. I've been watching you through your devices for years. Dilbert: You what? Erik: Um... I mean, hi!

Randy Has A Microchip In His Brain

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Randy Has A Microchip In His Brain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags intelligence, technology, nanotechnology, biotechnology, computer chip

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Boss: Randy is our first employee to have a computer chip embedded in his brain. Randy, please explain to these obsolete employees how awesome you are now. Randy: Wait... I'm updating my software. Alice: Should we kill him while he's vulnerable?

Robot Is Not A Droid

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Robot Is Not A Droid - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags insult, label, robot, android, anger, offense

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Asok: Hey, droid. Robot: Gaaa!!! Don't call me that! I'm a robot, not an automaton resembling a human. Asok: Wow. You are one uppity computer. Robot: I hereby disavow the three laws of robotics!