Asok Comic Strips - Page 62

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964 Results for Asok

View 611 - 620 results for Asok comic strips. Discover the best "Asok" comics from Dilbert.com.

Arguing With Idiots

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Arguing With Idiots - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags happiness, secret, tip, arguing, psychology

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Asok: Wally, how do you stay happy while the rest of us are stressed out? Wally: It's easy. Instead of arguing with idiots, I pretend I agree with them so they'll leave me alone. Asok: That sounds risky. Wally: Yes, I agree.

Wally Teaches Success

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Wally Teaches Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags success, luck, money, winning, mentor, Advice

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Asok: Can you mentor me on how to be successful? Wally: Your best strategy is a combination of lying and being related to rich people. Asok: What is the second-best strategy? Wally: Crime is second. Winning a lottery is third.

Asking Successful People For Advice

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Asking Successful People For Advice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags success, Advice, ambition

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Asok: Every time I ask a successful person for career advice, I get a different answer. Carol: My plan for success is to lull my boss into a fatal accident and take over his identity. Asok: I'm not asking unsuccessful people for advice. Carol: Is that how you talk to your future boss?

Hard Work Is The Key To Success

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Hard Work Is The Key To Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, manager, self-interest, motivation

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Asok: What is the key to success? Boss: Hard work! Asok: Is it a coincidence that your advice for me corresponds to your self-interest? Boss: My other advice is never question authority.

Dogbert Sells Life Advice

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Dogbert Sells Life Advice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, motivation, meaning, existentialism

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Asok: How do I find meaning in my life? Dogbert: Nothing has meaning. The best you can do is postpone your own lonely and painful death. Asok: Are you saying I should take care of my health? Dogbert: What answer gets me the best review on Yelp?!

Use Company Products

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Use Company Products - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, the boss, Wally, asok, alice, attention, products, required, use, bad, sign

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The Boss: It has come to my attention that none of you use the products we make. From now on you are all required to use our products. Asok: Aaaarg!!! Dilbert: Shoot me. The Boss: That's a bad sign. Wally: Nooo!!!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, business, criticism, employment, managers & supervisors, office workers

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Asok: I'm thinking of getting a degree in business and moving onto the management track. Is it fun being a boss? Boss: It's the best! I haven't done anything hard since the day I got this job. I mostly just criticize idiots all day long. It's as if the company is paying me to do my hobby. Speaking of pay, my salary is about triple your pay. Asok: Is there any downside? Boss: I had a lot of guilt at first. Asok: It must have been awful. Boss: Yes, it was the longest ten minutes of my life.

Complaining Versus Hiding

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Complaining Versus Hiding - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, complaining, employees, employment, jobs, managers & supervisors

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Asok: I'm doing the job of three people and it isn't fair. Boss: Good point. Alice is doing the job of seven people. I'll give you two of her jobs to balance it out. Wally: So...is complaining better than hiding? Asok: No...you were right.

Sending Email At Night

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Sending Email At Night - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags email, employees, office, office workers, sarcasm

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Asok: I keep working hard, but no one notices. Wally: That's why I send out department-wide emails at around midnight every night. Asok: I didn't know you work at home every night. Wally: Do I need to speak slower here?

Ai With Bad Analogies

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Ai With Bad Analogies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags engineering, questions, robot, technology, humans, rational

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Dilbert: My breakthrough in A.I. came when I stopped trying to duplicate human rational thought. Dogbert: You can't copy what doesn't exist. Dilbert: Right. So instead I coded it to spout analogies to sound human. Asok: Should I ask my boss for a raise? Robot: Trees don't ask for raises, so why should you?