Ex Ceo Comic Strips - Page 62

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619 Results for Ex Ceo

View 611 - 619 results for ex ceo comic strips. Discover the best "Ex Ceo" comics from Dilbert.com.

Bad Denials

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Bad Denials - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 15, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #spying, #elbonia

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ceo: have you confirmed that the cyber attacks are coming from elbonia? dilbert: no. ceo: i guess that means you are on their side. dilbert: what? catbert: what proof do you have that dilbert is a spy? ceo: he didn't deny it the way I think he should have.

Prove A Negative

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Prove A Negative - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 12, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #accusations, #negative

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ceo to dilbert: is this everything i need to know? dilbert: yes. ceo: how can you be sure there isn't something out there we don't know about? dlbert: are you asking me to prove a negative? ceo: it's more of an accusation than a question.

Drooling Incompetents

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Drooling Incompetents - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #competent, #incompetent

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wally at team meeting. wally: i've been asked to lead this project toward failure so my boss can convince our ceo to cancel it. wally: i'd like all of the competent people on the team to step aside, while the drooling incompetents who remain drive it into a ditch. office worker: how can we know who among us are the competent ones? wally: well, for starters, they don't ask that question.

Why Not A Center Of Excellence

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Why Not A Center Of Excellence - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 02, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #excellence

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ceo: maybe we should creat a "center of excellence." the boss: what exactly does that mean? ceo: i think it means whatever we want it to mean. the boss: then what good is it? ceo: let's not get lost in the weeds.

Consultant Gets No Help

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Consultant Gets No Help - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 24, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #business ethics, #lazy, #managers & supervisors, #selfish, #stupid

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the new consultant: none of your department heads are cooperating with me. several are selfish, lazy and stupid, while others are actively working against me. maybe you could talk to them. ceo: i hired you so i wouldn't need to talk to losers.

Test Device Analogy

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Test Device Analogy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 08, 2019's comic on:


Tags #office workers, #technology, #power drill, #test, #device, #analogy, #office

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dilbert: i designed the test device to be held like one would hold a power drill ted: that's stupid. that product can't drill a hole in anything ceo: good point dilbert: that's... not... how analogies work. ted: and what if i don't need to drill anything? ceo: yeah!

Looks Like A Duck

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Looks Like A Duck - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 24, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #sayings, #duck, #update

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ceo: if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it's... dilbert: a deep fake? ceo: i was going to say duck. dilbert: you might want to update your folksy sayings every century or two.

Ceo In Cubicle

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Ceo In Cubicle - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 2020's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #private, #office, #cubicle, #common, #work, #employees

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eco: i've decided to give up my private office and work from a cubicle so employees will respect me more. my cubicle will be 1,000 square feet, with a ceiling. dilbert: that's called an office. eco: nothing pleases you common folk.

Ted Talks Might Take Your Job

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Ted Talks Might Take Your Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 27, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #social media, #technology, #instagram, #ted talks, #smart, #moron

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boss: the moron i hired keeps watching ted talks and getting smarter. he's only about three ted talks away from taking your job. ceo: there must be a way to slow him down. boss: i'll see if i can interest him in instagram.