Necklace Computer Comic Strips - Page 62
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635 Results for Necklace Computer
View 611 - 620 results for necklace computer comic strips. Discover the best "Necklace Computer" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday July 07,
2014
Tags #computers & peripherals, #frustration, #inventions, #no sense, #standard turing test, #upset, #company strategy
Transcript
Dilbert: My software can't pass a standard Turing test yet, but it does pass the pointy-haired boss test. Computer, I have a question about our company strategy. Computer: Try working smarter. Dilbert: That doesn't even make sense! CEO: I wasn't prepared to like it, but you won me over.
Sunday March 01,
2015
Tags #computers, #customer service, #frustration, #installing drivers, #software, #tech support, #technical support, #technology, #engineering
Transcript
Dogbert's Tech Support. Dilbert: The error message says my copy of Windows is not genuine. Dogbert" I'll walk you through a series of steps that won't work. Dilbert: Wait... what? Dogbert: After seventeen attempts that involve rebooting, you will lose hope. At some point you will give up and buy a new computer just to be done with it all. We'll start by uninstalling all of your drivers and reinstalling. Dilbert: Can I skip all of the useless steps and just buy a new computer? Dogbert: Sure, but you don't need to be a jerk about it.
Tuesday March 31,
2015
Tina Strings Economic Words Together
Tags #economist, #economy, #deception, #jargon, #prediction, #stock market, #recession, #money
Transcript
Wally The Chief Economist. Tina: My interview with you is live on the website. Nothing you said made sense, so I strung together a bunch of economic jargon and called it your forecast. One Month Later. Computer: Only one economist accurately predicted when this bubble would burst. Dilbert: Uh-oh.
Monday June 29,
2015
Dilbert Goes Into Hiding
Tags #hiding, #forget, #forgotten, #forgot, #friendship, #relationships
Transcript
Computer: This is Dilbert with an encrypted message from my hiding place from the government. Dogbert: Dilbert who? Dilbert: I only left yesterday!!! Dogbert: I don't like to dwell in the past.
Wednesday October 07,
2015
Computers Program Humans
Tags #robots, #program, #intelligence, #control, #medication, #medicine, #pill, #technology, #power
Transcript
Robot: It is time to take your mood-altering prescription meds. Boss: Oh, right. Robot: Wait... IBM's Watson computer has added another prescription and sent it to your 3-D pill printer at home. Do you think robots will ever program humans? Boss: That's dumb.
Thursday November 19,
2015
Dick From The Internet
Tags #internet, #comment, #jerk, #racism, #misconstrue, #social media, #technology
Transcript
Dilbert: An Elbonian start-up invented a new kind of computer mouse. Coworker: Wait until I tell the world that you compared Elbonians to mice, you racists! Hi, I'm Dick, from the Internet. Wally: We're familiar with your work.
Wednesday September 28,
2016
Meet At My Office
Thursday January 26,
2017
Boss Tweets Sexist Stuff
Tags #cell phone, #computer, #conversation, #desk, #tweets, #technology
Transcript
Our customers organized a boycott because of your racist tweet. I know. That's why I tweeted out some witty insults at the organizers. Your new tweets are sexist. Notice how the make you forget about my racist tweets?
Thursday May 04,
2017
Erik Used To Work For The Cia
Tags #surveillance, #cia, #technology, #spying, #privacy
Transcript
Boss: This is our new hire, Erik. He used to be a computer programmer for the CIA. Dilbert: Hi, I'm Dilbert. Erik: I know. I've been watching you through your devices for years. Dilbert: You what? Erik: Um... I mean, hi!