Talking To Much Comic Strips - Page 62

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

700 Results for Talking To Much

View 611 - 620 results for talking to much comic strips. Discover the best "Talking To Much" comics from Dilbert.com.

Two Ways To Avoid Listening

Thank you for voting.
Two Ways To Avoid Listening - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 28, 2016's comic on:

Tags #Advice, #mentor, #listening, #attention

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: There are two good ways to avoid listening to others. 1.) Do all of the talking yourself, and 2:) be too busy to listen. Asok: That sounds simplistic. Wally: I'm late for a meeting.

Phone Better Than Human

Thank you for voting.
Phone Better Than Human - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 14, 2016's comic on:

Tags #technology, #distraction, #human, #conversation

View Transcript

Transcript

Alan: Everything went wrong for me this week. I have problems... all kinds of problems. Dilbert: For the zillionth time in a row, my phone is more fun than talking to a human.

Just What She Thought

Thank you for voting.
Just What She Thought - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 15, 2016's comic on:

Tags #cell phone, #distraction, #technology, #conversation, #social interaction, #antisocial

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: I'd better check this. It's just what I thought. Dilbert: What did you think? Woman: I thought I would enjoy my phone more than talking to you.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 10, 2016's comic on:

Tags #Advice, #workload, #stress, #counseling

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I have too much work, and it's stressing me out. Boss: I've been reading about this sort of situation. Try writing don all the things that make you feel grateful. Dilbert: That would be more work! Boss: For your anger issues, try keeping a journal of all the times you lose your temper. Dilbert: That would be more work! Has anyone ever taken your advice? Boss: Do you know the guy in Marketing with the eye patch? Dilbert: He followed your advice? Boss: Half of it.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 14, 2016's comic on:

Tags #workload, #work ethic, #laziness, #teamwork, #team, #philosophy, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I don't know how you are stress-free when we have so much work to do. Wally: It's all about understanding percentages. No matter how hard you work, you will never finish even two percent of what needs to be done. The financial rewards of doing two percent of your work are identical to doing none. It's also a good idea to volunteer for several projects so everyone thinks you're working on the other ones. Your problem is that you're doing actual work for no good reason. Dilbert: My problem is that I'm doing your work plus my work! Wally: It's only two percent more work, you whiner.

Dilbert Characters

Asok Learns To Rank Priorities

Thank you for voting.
Asok Learns To Rank Priorities - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 15, 2016's comic on:

Tags #priorities, #Advice, #hate, #misanthrope, #misanthropy, #organization

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I'm overworked because I don't know how to set priorities. Alice: Try ranking your tasks by how much you hate the people who asked for your help. Asok: What if I don't hate anyone? Alice: That problem solves itself over time.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 25, 2016's comic on:

Tags #mentor, #mentorship, #competition, #honesty, #truth

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I need some mentoring. Boss: This is awkward. On one hand, helping you would make me appear wise and generous. On the other hand, it would make you a more credible threat to take my job. I see you as more of an adversary than a subordinate. That's why I withhold vital information that you need to do your job. I've already said too much. Wally: Did you learn anything? Dilbert: Yes, unfortunately.

Wally's World Expands

Thank you for voting.
Wally's World Expands - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 22, 2016's comic on:

Tags #window, #view, #seeing, #perspective, #office, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: My world view has expanded since I moved to a cubicle near a window. I didn't realize how much stuff was outside our building. Boss: Such as the rest of the universe? Wally: I can only see the alley in front of the parking garage.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 16, 2016's comic on:

Tags #engagement, #review, #shortcut, #honesty, #human resources, #hr, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: How's your employee engagement coming along? Dilbert: I'll make you a deal... I'll pretend I'm happy to be here if you pretend you believe it. Boss: I need more than that. I also want you to pretend you're loyal to the company. Dilbert: I can do that, if you pretend you're interested in my career development. Boss: Can we do all of that without talking? Dilbert: That's the best way. Boss: My job was a lot harder before I figured out all the shortcuts.

Fire The Bottom Ten Percent

Thank you for voting.
Fire The Bottom Ten Percent - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 07, 2016's comic on:

Tags #rank, #hierarchy, #value, #fired, #termination, #layoff, #logic, #executives

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I want you to fire the employees you ranked in the bottom ten percent. Boss: Wouldn't that just put someone else in the bottom ten percent? CEO: Everything made sense until you started talking. Boss: Sorry.