Life Without Mangement Comic Strips - Page 63

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View 621 - 630 results for life without mangement comic strips. Discover the best "Life Without Mangement" comics from Dilbert.com.

Show Interest In Employees

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Show Interest In Employees - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #appointment, #business, #doctor, #employees, #hate, #interest, #leave, #life, #managers & supervisors, #prank, #question

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alice: i have a doctor appointment. boss: what's wrong with you? alice yelling: that's none of your stinkin' business! stay our of my life! boss to catbert: didn't you advise me to show interest in my employees? catbert: i was pranking you. they hate that.

Decisions Without Data

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Decisions Without Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #decision, #managers & supervisors, #business, #time, #compile, #facts, #guess, #career

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dilbert with face mask: i need a quick decision on this, but i don't have time to compile the relevant facts. boss with face mask: without facts, i would just be guessing. dilbert: it won't affect your career average. boss: why wouldn't it? dilbert: let's change the subject.

Dilbert Has To Upgrade Server

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Dilbert Has To Upgrade Server - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coronavirus, #business, #technology, #network, #upgrade, #server, #boss, #latency, #locks, #garage, #sleep, #face mask, #work from home

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dilbert wearing face mask and carrying computer bag: i'm going into the office to upgrade a server. according to my boss, reducing network latency is more important than my life. can i depend on you to not change the locks while i'm gone? dogbert: only if you sleep in the garage.

Asok Meditates

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Asok Meditates  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coffee, #psychology, #sarcasm, #business, #meditation, #think, #work, #co-worker, #technology, #enlightenment

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asok: have you ever tried meditating? wally: sounds like a lot of work. asok: it is the opposite of work. all you have to do is sit in one place and think of nothing in particular. wally: can i drink coffee at the same time. asok: that is not recommended. wally: in other words, meditating is what i already do, but without the advantage of coffee? asok: perhaps you have already achieved enlightenment. wally: feels that way to me.

High Fives

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High Fives - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #hygiene, #life, #office workers, #virus, #pandemic, #social distancing

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Boss: To avoid spreading viruses, there will be no shaking hands in the workplace. That custom has been replaced by uncomfortable body language and awkward banter about not shaking hands. Dilbert: Are high-fives still okay? Boss: Yes, we don't care if those people live or die.

One Source Of Stress

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One Source Of Stress - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #work at home, #human, #contact, #stress, #co-workers, #bored, #print, #money

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dilbert thinking: i've had no human contact for months. i wasn't expecting to enjoy it so much. my love life was already a barren wasteland. and avoiding my co-workers is always good. i haven't been stressed, tired, or bored in weeks. i only have one remaining source of stress in my life. dilbert sitting on couch with dogbert dogbert: i'm printing money in the basement. dilbert: there it is.

Lack Of Social Contact

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Lack Of Social Contact - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #pandemic, #technology, #social, #contact, #best, #week, #covid, #cope

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Wally and Dilbert at coffee pot wearing face masks. dilbert: how did you cope with the loss of social contact during the pandemic? wally: best weeks of my life. how about you? dilbert: i didn't want to be the first to say it.

Boss Fired For Being White Supremacist

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Boss Fired For Being White Supremacist  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #racism, #fired, #employees, #white supremacist, #apathy, #career, #punch, #witness, #denial

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ceo: i have to fire you because employees are saying you are a white supremacist. boss: but i'm not. ceo: doesn't matter. i care more about my career than your life. boss: you're firing me just to look good? ceo: and i'll need to punch you in front of witnesses.

Helpful Advice

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Helpful Advice   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #technology, #Advice, #personal, #life, #quality, #work

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co-worker: can i give you some helpful advice? dilbert: judging by the quality of your life, i'd say you probably can't. co-worker: leave my personal life out of it. dilbert: okay, let's talk about the putrid quality of your work.

Edits Without Tracking

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 Edits Without Tracking  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accident, #business, #complex, #delete, #document, #edit, #email, #face mask, #forgot, #technology, #tracker

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co-worker: i edited your incredibly complex document and sent it to you by email. dilbert: i don't see your high-lighted changes. co-worker: i forgot to turn on the edit tracker. dilbert: i'm going to accidentally delete your email. co-worker: that's probably how i'd play it too.