Bends Over Comic Strips - Page 64

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

639 Results for Bends Over

View 631 - 639 results for bends over comic strips. Discover the best "Bends Over" comics from Dilbert.com.

Hallucinations At Meetings

Thank you for voting.
Hallucinations At Meetings - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 21, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #server, #hallucinate, #network

View Transcript

Transcript

in conference room. dilbert: i recommend we upgrade one of our servers over the weekend. office workers: so, just to be clear, you want to replace our entire network in two days? dilbert: um...no. i want to replace one defective server. office worker: we can't replace our entire network in two days! that is ridiculous! dilbert: i don't know what is happening right now. dilbert: it's as if they things i say have no impact on what you hallucinate you are hearing. office worker: you think you can replace an entire network in two days, and you think i'm the one who is hallucinating? dilbert: i don't know what to do right now. office worker: your incompetence is confirmed.

Jargon Poisoning

Thank you for voting.
Jargon Poisoning - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 26, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #huddle, #jargon, #calendar

View Transcript

Transcript

ted: let's plan a huddle to ideate around that opportunity. dilbert visually distressed and yelling: gaaa!!! i have jargon poisoning! ted: i'll send you a calendar invite. dilbert has fell over and feet are in air.

Mad Or Flirting

Thank you for voting.
Mad Or Flirting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 14, 2019's comic on:

Tags #flirting, #relationships, #feelings, #awkward, #psychology, #anger, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: why are you mad at me? Carol: i'm not dilbert: oh. i'm not good at reading people's feelings carol: true dilbert: are you flirting with me now? carol getting up: i'm going to sit over here

Can't Work From Home

Thank you for voting.
Can't Work From Home - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 18, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #power, #work from home

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: can i work from home? boss: no, because then i won't have the enjoyable sensation of wielding power over you. dilbert: everything about that sounds wrong. boss: off you go.

Not Fair

Thank you for voting.
Not Fair - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 19, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #work from home, #fairness, #power

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: i hear we are not allowed to work from home because it doesn't satisfy your sick need to wield power over us in person. boss: that's not fair. tina: is it accurate? boss: let's stick with "not fair."

Dilbert Characters

Just Like Marketing

Thank you for voting.
Just Like Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 2020's comic on:

Tags #business, #marketing, #project, #managers, #stupidity, #transfer, #extinguished, #divinity

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: how's your project going? dilbert: it was doing fine until a thick wave of stupidity swept over it and extinguished my spark of divinity. i don't know what will become of me. boss: i'll transfer you to marketing. they're all like that.

Violating Rules

Thank you for voting.
Violating Rules - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 2020's comic on:

Tags #managers & supervisors, #rules, #business, #audit, #employees, #company

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: our internal audit found that you violated over four hundred company rules in the past year. dilbert: i'm also the only employee who accomplished anything last year. now connect the dots. boss: so you're saying we need more rules.

Marketing Complains

Thank you for voting.
Marketing Complains - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 04, 2020's comic on:

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #marketing, #complain, #moronic, #fired

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: marketing is complaining that you're not using their ideas. dilbert: that's because all of their ideas are moronic. boss: i told them i fired you. don't leave your cubicle or use any digital devices until this blows over.

Bias For Action

Thank you for voting.
Bias For Action - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 14, 2020's comic on:

Tags #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #co-workers, #business, #meeting, #prototype, #bias

View Transcript

Transcript

Co-workers around meeting table. Ted: our pointy-haired boss told us to scrap our prototype and start over from scratch. dilbert: o was in that meeting and he said nothing like that. maybe we should verify what he wants. ted: or... we could have a bias for action!