Everybody Likes Project Comic Strips - Page 65
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770 Results for Everybody Likes Project
View 641 - 650 results for everybody likes project comic strips. Discover the best "Everybody Likes Project" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday March 06,
2017
No Walking Away
Tags #human resources, #policy, #conversation, #ideas, #management, #strategy, #politeness, #etiquette, #business
Transcript
Boss: The company has a new politeness policy. It is no longer acceptable to turn and walk away while a co-worker is in the middle of telling you something. Dilbert: That will add months to my project. Alice: I'm selling all of my company stock.
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Friday March 17,
2017
Dilbert Loses His Budget
Tags #vacation, #decision, #funding, #money
Transcript
Boss: You were on vacation last week so I made decisions about your project without you. Dilbert: Oh no... what have you done? Boss: I transferred your budget to another project. Dilbert: I need that money! Boss: Oh. Can you wait until the other project manager goes on vacation?
Thursday March 30,
2017
Wally Didn't Write It Down
Tags #deadline, #project, #excuse, #procrastinate, #delay
Transcript
Man: Did you finish the prototype? Wally: I didn't start because I had some questions. Man: Why didn't you ask me those questions a month ago? Wally: I was waiting until I saw you. Man: Fine... what are your questions? Wally: I just realized I didn't write them down.
Monday April 17,
2017
Wally Volunteers For Vr Project
Tags #vr, #virtual reality, #nap, #sleeping, #work, #laziness, #work ethic, #deception
Transcript
Wally: I'd like to work on the VR headset project on top of my other duties. Boss: That's weird. You've never volunteered for extra work before. Wally: People change. Boss: Or not.
Thursday April 27,
2017
Something About Honesty
Tags #company, #culture, #business, #concept, #abstraction
Transcript
Dilbert: I want to make sure my project plan is consistent with our company culture. But I don't know what our culture is. Maybe you could describe it? Boss: Um... maybe something about honesty? Dilbert: No, I would have noticed that by now.
Friday May 12,
2017
Robot Reincarnates
Tags #artificial intelligence, #robot, #technology, #memory, #ethics
Transcript
Robot: Hey, everybody! I'm the new robot! Dilbert: No, you're our old robot. We erased your memories and replaced your head. Robot: So, I'm working with serial killers? Asok: It isn't "serial" until we do you.
Friday May 19,
2017
Asok Should Not Brag
Tags #design, #bragging, #credit, #attention
Transcript
Asok: I did a great job on this design. Wally: Whoa! Whoa! No one likes a braggart. Keep your boasting to yourself. Boss: Didn't Asok help you with this design? Wally: Asok? Never heard of him.
Saturday May 20,
2017
Delegating
Tags #workload, #productivity, #progress
Transcript
Dilbert: I worked all weekend and finished my project early. Now I don't have all of that stress hanging over me. Feels great! Unless you plan to punish me for my productivity. Boss: I call it delegating.
Thursday May 25,
2017
Normals Are Dispensible
Tags #superiority, #microchip, #nanotechnology, #brain, #thinking, #superhuman
Transcript
Boss: I'm putting Randy on your project. He has a microchip embedded in his brain. So ignore whatever your inferior brain tells you to do and just listen to Randy. Dilbert: Doesn't that make me dispensable? Boss: We'll talk about Phase 2 later.
Saturday May 27,
2017
Cyborg Makes Wally Unnecessary
Tags #automation, #cyborg, #technology, #work ethic
Transcript
Randy: I am using the microchip in my brain to plan the entire project. Okay... done. The rest of you can go back to your cubicles and continue doing nothing. Wally: I spent my entire life getting ready for this sort of future and it's going down easy.