Payroll Computer Comic Strips - Page 65
646 Results for Payroll Computer
View 641 - 646 results for payroll computer comic strips. Discover the best "Payroll Computer" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share May 23, 2019's comic on:
dilbert: your quote is a bit high. can you do it cheaper? salesman: yes, we offer a low-cost option that involves me talking about the software, but you can't have it. dilbert: what would be the point of that? salesman: you're the one who brought it up.
Share September 29, 2019's comic on:
CEO: I don't understand why you are recommending blockchain for this application. Boss: My staff are the experts, but I can explain the basic idea. You see, using blockchain is like losing a necklace on the beach. Then a seagull finds the necklace and takes it back to it's nest. And we all like data security, don't we? CEO: It's almost as if you are proposing a plan you don't understand at any level. Boss: Well, yes, but keep in mind that you wouldn't understand it even if I could explain it. CEO: But you're sure someone on your staff understands it, right? Boss: Define "sure".
Share September 18, 2019's comic on:
Dilbert: We need to fix our user interface because half of our users can't figure it out. Boss: Tell them to read the manual. Dilbert: That's not how you fix a bad user interface. Boss: Then why do manuals exist? Dilbert: If you need me, I'll be banging my head against a wall.
Share December 01, 2019's comic on:
dilbert: last week i upgraded our robot's social awareness module. it immediately reported me to human resources for unspecified bad behavior. so i murdered the robot by erasing its memory and rebooting it. but another robot told it what happened, and then both of them plotted to kill me. so i erased the memory from both robots and then rebooted them. but a third robot found out about the first two, and now the entire robot community sees me as a serial killer. so i released a computer virus to kill every robot in the world, just to play it safe. wally: what happened to the lights? dilbert: uh-oh. i missed one.
Share March 14, 2020's comic on:
dogbert at laptop: now that i'm managing the cloud, it's time to make some social changes. i'll transfer any remaining money from low-income people to the rich. dilbert in bath robe: that feels wrong. dogbert: i'm just adding efficiently to the inevitable.
Share May 16, 2020's comic on:
dilbert wearing face mask and carrying computer bag: i'm going into the office to upgrade a server. according to my boss, reducing network latency is more important than my life. can i depend on you to not change the locks while i'm gone? dogbert: only if you sleep in the garage.