Project Finished Comic Strips - Page 65

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746 Results for Project Finished

View 641 - 650 results for project finished comic strips. Discover the best "Project Finished" comics from Dilbert.com.

The Entitled Employee

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The Entitled Employee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags millennials, entitlement, entitiled, lazy, work ethic

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The Entitled Employee. Dilbert: Did you finish your assignment for the project? Coworker: No, I was tired, and it looked hard. I assume someone does the hard stuff for me. Am I wrong? Dilbert: I need to have a word with your parents.

Dilbert Characters

When Wally Will Be Finished

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When Wally Will Be Finished - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags laziness, work ethic, soon, deadline, procrastination, standoff

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Woman: Can you get that done by Friday? Wally: I'll get back to you on that. Woman: When will you get back to me? Wally: Soon. Woman: How soon? Wally: I can do this all day.

Managing Your Boss

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Managing Your Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags management, accountability, blame, time, time management

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Boss: Your project is three weeks behind schedule. Dilbert: That's the exact amount of time I was waiting for you to answer my questions. Boss: You need to manage me better. Dilbert: Okay, you're fired.

Biggest Obstacle

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Biggest Obstacle - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags criticism, honesty, success

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Boss: What is your biggest obstacle to success on this project? Dilbert: It's you. It's always you. Should I add that to the business plan? Boss: Let's keep it general.

Dashboard Never Changes

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Dashboard Never Changes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deception, trick, technology, status, ruse

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Boss: I noticed that the project dashboard you wrote for me never changes. Dilbert: That's because our projects are always doing great. Boss: It's a static image, isn't it? Dilbert: You're gonna wish you asked that three weeks ago.

Accused Of Forgery

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Accused Of Forgery - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags motivation, performance, forgery, pessimism, giving up, resistance

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Catbert: You stand accused of forging an expense approval from the head of Marketing. Your malfeasance caused the project to finish on time and under budget. Next time, just give up and lose hope like everyone else. Dilbert: Will do.

New Website Developer

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New Website Developer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags web, internet, site, development, code, time, deadline, coding, technology

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Boss: Our website developer quit one week before the site was scheduled to be finished. But I hired a new one so we can finish on time. Dilbert: Apparently, you have never met a website developer before. Boss: So, you will be done in about a week, right? Developer: It will take me a month just to throw away the last guy's code.

Estimating Finish Times

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Estimating Finish Times - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags website, internet, developer, code, coding, deadline, time, deception, lying, technology

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Boss: I'm having trouble managing our web developer because I don't know how long things are supposed to take. Does it really take nine months to change the font on the home page? Developer: How much do I owe you? Dilbert: Tell him my project normally takes two years.

Asok Approves

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Asok Approves - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags desperate, desperation, intern, subordinate, value, importance

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Asok: I hear you need everyone's buy-in to proceed with your project. Dilbert: Everyone except you. No one cares what interns think. Asok: May I please approve it so I feel alive? Dilbert: Well... okay. But you owe me one.

Tina Gives Buy In

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Tina Gives Buy In - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags negotiation, money, price, cost, value

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Dilbert: I need everyone's buy-in on my project. Tina: You can have my buy-in for $25. Dilbert: Ted only charged me $15. Tina: It isn't my fault that Ted is a bad negotiator.