Office Equipment Comic Strips - Page 66

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View 651 - 660 results for office equipment comic strips. Discover the best "Office Equipment" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags lost id badge, security offcie, sneak, angel with bacon, looks around

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Dilbert: I lost my ID besiege. Security: Report to the security office and get a new one. Hold it where do you think you're going? Dilbert: To the security office? Security: No one is allowed past this desk with out an ID badge. Dilbert: Okay....how do I go to the security office if I can't go to the security office? Security: Good question. I guess you'll have to steal past me. Dilbert: Look over there! Its an angel and she's giving away free bacon! Security: well well It seems Ive found a worthy adversary.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags taking chance, indoor plumbing, teach human habits, feral emplyee, trained, office

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"The feral employee" "I'm taking a chance by hiring you. Dont make me regret it." "Today, one of my seasoned professionals will teach you to use indoor plumbing." "Look! Look at me! The newspaper tucks under the arm!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags engineers, office, name, zinger, introductions, invisible, resentful

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Why its great to be an engineer Hi Dilbert. Dilbert: Hi...there. He doesn't remember my name. Say it! Say my name! Hey dilbert. Now he'll be forced to introduce me, her- her. Alice: Am I interupting anything? dilbert: no Its awkward for you now. HA HA! squirm, you name forgetter. The pressure too introduce me must be killing you . HAHA! Dilbert: Do you have the new software specs? Alice: follow me. Alice: who was that guy? Dilbert: What guy?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags pantless prima donna, alert patent offcie, hardware, computer, technology

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"Pantless prima donna" "May I ask you a question?" "Silence, fool!" "Alert the patent office that I am about to begin. They might want to increase staff." "Maybe you should turn on your computer." "I don't do hardware."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags science of fengshui, technical merits, witch doctor, astrologer, cutomer

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Visiting a customer "Our office was designed with the science of Feng Shui." "Should I describe the technical merits of our product or will you be consulting with a witch doctor?" "Oops. Sorry. That one snuck up on me." "He's an astrologer, not at witch doctor."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss's office, employee, exciting challenges, fertilized plant, hard work done, tree grows

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Asok: "I worked nights and weekends to finish my project ahead of schedule." The Boss: "Good. Here's more work." Asok: "I don't understand. Am I being punished for working hard?" The Boss: "No, you're being rewarded with exciting new challenges." Asok: "Why does the plant grow faster when you say things like that?" The Boss: "No reason." "Stop that!" "Anyway, your annual performance review will award your hard work." Wally: That is one fertilized plant

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, closes door, hobby, hurting boss, leaves office

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Wally: "Every time our pointy haired boss leaves his office, I sneak in and seal an air hole." "I'm trying to see if he'll suffocate when he closes his door." "I've never had a hobby before. I can see why people like them."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags trick, paper, look busy, paper trick, hallways, wander, office, appearences, rest, avoid work

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"It looks like an ordinary piece of paper, but I added this finger holder." "Now when I wander the hallways looking busy I can totally rest my hand." "Working hard?" "Not any more!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags office relocation., new cubicle, less roomy, need butter, torso, slide in, attracts rats, cheap, low budget

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Office relocation. Asok: Your new cubicle is less roomy than the old one. You will need this butter. Apply it liberally to your torso area and you can slide right in. But don't stay in there for more than 10 minutes at a time because it attracts rats.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags office relocation, cubicle, air duct, facilities, chip out penguin, cold, cooler

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"Office relocation." "Some cubicles are slightly less desirable than others." "For example, your new cubicle is below an air duct so it is sometimes cooler than the area around it." "I asked the facilities people to chip out the penguin as soon as possible."