Cost Money Comic Strips - Page 66

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698 Results for Cost Money

View 651 - 660 results for cost money comic strips. Discover the best "Cost Money" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 02, 2017's comic on:


Tags #tldr, #email, #communication, #patience, #criticism

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Man: Did you read my email? Dilbert: No, it was too long. Man: Maybe you could read it when you have more time. Dilbert: I never have time to read email messages that are too long. Maybe you could rewrite it to be shorter. Man: I don't have time to rewrite it. Dilbert: And I don't have time to read it. Man: If no one reads that email, it will mean I wasted two hours writing it. Dilbert: Plus, you're wasting my time right now. Don't forget to include that in your failure assessment. Man: I had high hopes for that email. Dilbert: It's a sunk cost. Let it go.

3 D Printer Will Save Millions

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3 D Printer Will Save Millions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 14, 2017's comic on:


Tags #altruism, #money, #profit, #big business, #priorities, #morals, #life

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Dilbert: I invented a 3-D printer for the poor that can create any kind of generic drug or medical device. It will save millions. Boss: ...of dollars? Dilbert: People. Boss: Pass.

Priorities

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Priorities - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 28, 2017's comic on:


Tags #priorities, #culture, #company, #money, #greed, #business

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Alice: There seems to be some confusion about what our company culture is. Boss: Our priorities are honesty, integrity, and return on investment. Alice: Which priority is the highest? Boss: Integrity won't buy me a new boat.

Why Did The Algorithm Bump Dilbert

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Why Did The Algorithm Bump Dilbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 18, 2017's comic on:


Tags #airlines, #air travel, #flight, #overbooking, #customer service

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Dilbert: Why did your algorithm pick me to be bumped from the full flight? Is it because I had the lowest-cost ticket? Agent: It was that plus your lack of upper body strength.

Dilbert's Project Is Unfunded

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Dilbert's Project Is Unfunded  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 05, 2017's comic on:


Tags #managers, #forgetful, #forgetting, #money, #budget, #oversight

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Dilbert: I don't see my project in the new budget. Boss: Oh, right. I forgot all about you. Dilbert: That sounds easy to fix. Boss: Yup. MY problem will be solved as soon as you leave.

Be Creative With Funding

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Be Creative With Funding  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 06, 2017's comic on:


Tags #budget, #creativity, #funding, #money, #progress, #trick

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Dilbert: I couldn't do any work this week because you forgot to ask for funding for my project. Boss: Stop making excuses. Be creative. Ted: Why do you want to know my project charge code? Dilbert: Just curious.

Ted Complains About Dilbert

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Ted Complains About Dilbert  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 07, 2017's comic on:


Tags #budget, #money, #funding, #creativity, #embezzlement, #fraud

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Boss: Ted is complaining that you charged your expenses to his project. Dilbert: You told me to be creative because you forgot to fund my project. Boss: I wasn't expecting you to do that. Dilbert: That's what makes it creative. I looked it up.

Dilbert Is Under Budget

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Dilbert Is Under Budget - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 08, 2017's comic on:


Tags #project, #budget, #money, #stealing, #embezzlement, #consequences

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Ted: You charged expenses to my project code. Dilbert: I had to because I don't have a budget. Ted: This will make it seem as if I went over budget while you didn't spend a penny. Dilbert: Good point. Wally: How's your project coming along with no budget? Dilbert: Better than I'd hoped.

Scavenging For Parts

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Scavenging For Parts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 09, 2017's comic on:


Tags #friendship, #strategy, #parts, #scavenging, #money, #usury, #budget, #relationships

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Dilbert: My boss forgot to fund my project so I've been scavenging for parts. Robot: You usually don't make conversation with me. I guess this means we're friends now. People.

Unethical Assumptions

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Unethical Assumptions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 11, 2017's comic on:


Tags #money, #ethics, #misleading, #finances, #budget

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Boss: Your financial projection doesn't support my preferred strategy. Maybe you could tweak the discount rate to 40%. Dilbert: You're asking me to be unethical. Boss: Only with your assumptions.