Office Workers Comic Strips - Page 67
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1000 Results for Office Workers
View 661 - 670 results for office workers comic strips. Discover the best "Office Workers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday July 24,
2016
Tags capitalism, big business, competition, benefit
Transcript
CEO: The company's goal is to make the world a better place. Dilbert: How does that square with our stated goal of destroying our competition? If we succeed, those people will be out of jobs. After we annihilate our competition, we can jack up our prices to monopoly levels and take advantage of our customers. Most of our profits go toward making the rich richer. We don't even pay taxes. Meanwhile, my co-workers and I will be living a life that has been stripped of all meaning. Is that what you had in mind by "Making the world a better place?" CEO: I didn't mean better for everyone.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Sunday July 31,
2016
Tags time, time management
Transcript
Dilbert: You asked for a breakdown of what I did this month. I wasted 25 percent of my time in useless meetings. I spent 33 percent of my time listening to co-workers complain about other co-workers. I used 11 percent to resend files I already sent. 14 percent went to dealing with a rumor you started by accident. 16 percent went toward working on the wrong things because you communicate poorly. Boss: What did you do with the 1 percent that was left? Dilbert: You just experienced it.
Thursday August 11,
2016
Wally Gets A Man Cave
Tags nursing, babies, man cave, deception, children, office policy, Family
Transcript
Wally: We should have a private lactation room like other companies. Alice: Yes, we should. Boss: No one in my group is nursing a baby. Wally: What about visitors? Alice: Right. Wally: Thanks for helping me get my man cave at the office. Alice: What?
Monday August 22,
2016
Wally's Inappropriate Attire
Tags dress code, outfit, crop top, deception, ploy, trick, telecommuting, laziness, work ethic
Transcript
Boss: That is inappropriate office attire! Go home and work remotely for the rest of the day. Dilbert: How'd it work out? Wally: Phase one was a total success. Phase two involves napping.
Saturday August 27,
2016
Phil From Heck And The Speakerphone
Tags annoying, foibles, pet peeve, habit, office, cubicle
Transcript
Phil, The Prince Of Insufficient Light. Phil: I have a report that you use your speakerphone in a cubicle environment. Alice: In my defense, I only do it because of my total disregard for others. Phil: Sounds fair. That's why I do it too. Alice: Take your spoon and leave.
Tuesday September 20,
2016
Cubicle Near Thermostat
Tags temperature, office, cold, revenge, thermostat
Transcript
Wally: My new cubicle is the nearest one to the office thermostat. That makes me the de facto ruler of the indoor climate. Dilbert: Don't let the power corrupt you. Wally: I'll start by freezing all the skinny women who laughed at me!
Wednesday September 21,
2016
Tina Wants Warmer Temperature
Tags thermostat, temperature, deal, negotiation, cold, bribe
Transcript
Wally: My cubicle is near the thermostat and your desk has the est view of our boss' office. I'll see that you get the temperature you want if you warn me whenever our boss is on the move. Tina: Can you give me 76 degrees? Wally: Whoa! That'll cost you extra, Lucifer.
Thursday September 22,
2016
Wally's World Expands
Tags window, view, seeing, perspective, office, office workers
Transcript
Wally: My world view has expanded since I moved to a cubicle near a window. I didn't realize how much stuff was outside our building. Boss: Such as the rest of the universe? Wally: I can only see the alley in front of the parking garage.
Saturday September 24,
2016
P Ity The Windowless
Tags cubicle, office, office workers, location, window, ego, superiority
Transcript
Tina: Do you think you're better than me just because you have a cubicle with a window? Wally: Yes. Continuous exposure to new stimuli makes my brain create useful pathways and connections. Tina: I did not see that coming. Wally: I pity the windowless.

