Technology Certifictae Comic Strips - Page 67

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

695 Results for Technology Certifictae

View 661 - 670 results for technology certifictae comic strips. Discover the best "Technology Certifictae" comics from Dilbert.com.

Helpful Advice

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Helpful Advice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #technology, #Advice, #personal, #life, #quality, #work

View Transcript

Transcript

co-worker: can i give you some helpful advice? dilbert: judging by the quality of your life, i'd say you probably can't. co-worker: leave my personal life out of it. dilbert: okay, let's talk about the putrid quality of your work.

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Edits Without Tracking

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Edits Without Tracking - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accident, #business, #complex, #delete, #document, #edit, #email, #face mask, #forgot, #technology, #tracker

View Transcript

Transcript

co-worker: i edited your incredibly complex document and sent it to you by email. dilbert: i don't see your high-lighted changes. co-worker: i forgot to turn on the edit tracker. dilbert: i'm going to accidentally delete your email. co-worker: that's probably how i'd play it too.

Can't Let It Go

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Can't Let It Go - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #face mask, #let it go, #office workers, #software, #technology, #test

View Transcript

Transcript

co-worker: i thought you said we would be testing the software by today. dilbert: nope. i never said anything remotely like that. co-worker: i can't let this go. dilbert: i didn't think you could.

Ted Needed To Know

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Needed To Know - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #technology, #business, #email, #forward, #malice, #slander, #private, #know, #face maks

View Transcript

Transcript

alice: i forwarded your email to ted. Dilbert shaken: WHAT!!! i said bad things about ted! that was a private email to you! alice: he needed to know. dilbert yelling: he did not need to know!

It Is A Burden To Know You

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
It Is A Burden To Know You - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #technology, #video, #assignment, #homework, #helpful, #enemies

View Transcript

Transcript

co-worker: did you watch the video i sent? dilbert: it's a burden to know you because you keep assigning me homework. co-worker: i'm trying to be helpful. dilbert: can you help my enemies instead?

5 G Doorway To The Demon World

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
5 G Doorway To The Demon World - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #5g, #accident, #business, #demon, #public, #spook, #technology, #world

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: our 5g test accidentally opened a doorway to the demon world. boss: let's keep that to ourselves so we don't spook the public. dilbert: don't tell me. tell daryll. green demon standing behind boss: hey, nice world you have here.

Applying Math To Guesses

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Applying Math To Guesses - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #managers & supervisors, #employment, #business, #analysis, #discount rate, #installation, #maintenance, #project, #technology, #math, #guess, #sarcasm, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: how confident are you in your analysis? dilbert: very confident. boss: good. dilbert: unless i used the wrong discount rate, which is hard to know. boss: but otherwise, it's solid? dilbert: except for the installation and maintenance costs, which are wild guesses. and we don't know if we sized the project right, so costs could be double or triple. boss: it sounds as if you applied math to a bunch of wild guesses. dilbert: yes, but i got the result you wanted. boss: next time, just say that.

Where The Problems Are

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Where The Problems Are - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #application, #app, #technology, #improvement, #dumb, #implement, #problems, #insult, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

co-worker: do you have any suggestions for improving the app? dilbert: yes, but you are far too dumb to implement any of them, so i won't bother. co-worker: at least tell me where the problems are. dilbert pointing at co-worker: the big ones are all in this big bag of skin.

Package Design

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Package Design - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #vp of sales, #technology, #sales, #selling, #design, #proposal, #package, #jump, #roof, #crazy, #sarcasm, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i got feedback on the proposed package design. our vp of sales says if we go with this design, he will "jump off the roof." alice: is he crazy or just good at selling? dilbert: no way to tell.

Artificial Dumbness

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Artificial Dumbness - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #cell phone, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #software, #invention, #artificial, #dumb, #human, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: my new software invention is called "artificial dumbness." it acts dumb so humans will think they are talking to one of their own. boss: that couldn't possibly work. dilbert's phone echos: that couldn't possibly work.