Asok Comic Strips - Page 68
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Character
963 Results for Asok
View 671 - 680 results for Asok comic strips. Discover the best "Asok" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday November 16,
2010
Tags meetings, question, nonsense, optimize, value stream, surprise, talk, listening
Transcript
Wally says, "Are you leveraging our resources to optimize the client value stream?" Asok says, "What?" Wally says, "I'm just messing with you? Nothing I say in meetings actually means anything." Asok says, "Then why do you talk?" Wally says, "I tried listening once. It was awful."
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday November 25,
2010
Tags director of purchasing, ethernet switch, pencils, annoyed, problem, dinosaur
Transcript
Bob, Director of Purchasing Asok says, "I requested an ethernet switch and you sent me a box of pencils." Bob says, "Sometimes I tweak the non-standard orders so I can use our approved vendors." Asok says, "You can't tell the difference between a switch and a pencil?" Bob says, "I can tell the difference between your problem and mine."
Monday December 06,
2010
Tags body language, at odds with words, endocrine system, shutting down, interrupted boss, crazy, psychotic episode
Transcript
Asok says, "Am I interrupting anything important?" Asok says, "Oh no. I have seen this before. You are preparing to put your body language at odds with your words!" The Boss says, "I always have time for my least important employee." Asok says, "My endocrine system is shutting down!"
Saturday December 11,
2010
Tags social netowrks, Games, phones, curb pick up, dustbin of history, twitter
Transcript
Dogbert says, "The only thing that matter are social networks, games and phones." Dogbert says, "You're not working on any of that, so I arranged for the dustbin of history to do curb pickup." Asok says, "Please! I Twitter!" Garbage man says, "Too little, too late."
Saturday December 18,
2010
Tags noisy bag of chips, speaker phone, common sense, wounded ego, guy on speaker phone
Transcript
Dilbert says, "Maybe it's not a good idea to eat a noisy bag of chips next to a speaker-phone." Dilbert says, "Uh-oh. My common sense has wounded your ego and made you defiant." Asok says, "Did you really think he would stop?" Dilbert says, "No. I hate the guy who was on the speaker-phone."
Thursday December 23,
2010
Tags experinced, industry, technology, youth oriented, culture, modem, hit with modem, new technology
Transcript
Old man: I know what Im talking about. I have thirty years in this industry! Asok: How does that help you understand technology that is six months old in a youth oriented culture? Old man: GRRR... ASOK: Please don't hit me with your modem.
Thursday January 27,
2011
Tags fear, rodents, transcontinental journeys, elbonia, too cold, airplanes, operate, underground route, fly, switzerland, swear system, sewerside mission, warm jacket, rat hammer
Transcript
The Boss says, "Asok, I need you to go to Elbonia. It's too cold for airplanes to operate there, so you'll need to use the underground route." The Boss says, "Fly into Switzerland and follow the sewer systems from there. Stick to the side of the sewer where it's dryer." Asok says, "It's a sewerside mission!" The Boss says, "You'll need a warm jacket and a rat hammer."
Friday January 28,
2011
Tags act nervous, air travel, airport security, guards, more invasive, new pat down, procedures, situations, sleeper cell, terrorits, tsa, molestation
Transcript
Airport Security Man says, "Step over here, sleeper cell." Man says, "Our new pat down procedures might be more invasive than you're used to." Man says, "Only terrorists act nervous in these situations." Airport Security
Saturday January 29,
2011
Tags terrorists, work ethic, elbonian leftists, kidnapped, ransom demands, three pack tube socks, carton milk, six yams, making life nightmare, gives in to kidnappers
Transcript
Carol says, "Elbonian leftists kidnapped Asok. They have ransom demands." Carol says, "They want a three-pack of tube socks, a carton of milk, and six yams." The Boss says, "Maybe you could buy that stuff on your way home." Carol says, "You're making my life a nightmare! Just keep him!"
Monday January 31,
2011
Tags fear, terrorists, viruses, elbonian kidnappers, refused ransom pay, stockholm syndrome, identifying with captors, beating up, contagious
Transcript
Asok says, "I thought my Elbonian kidnappers would hold me forever because you refused to pay the ransom." Asok says, "Then the Stockholm effect kicked in. I started identifying with my captors and beating myself." The Boss says, "And they let you go?" Asok says, "Apparently it looked contagious."

