Arms Out Comic Strips - Page 68

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Arms Out

View 671 - 680 results for arms out comic strips. Discover the best "Arms Out" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new guy, rude or shy, rudy, shilo, don't know name, boss introductions, no one knows, name him

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss is standing with a worker and says to Dilbert, "Here's the new guy. I don't know his name." The boss continues, "He's either rude or shy. No one knows for sure." The boss says, "If you figure it out, name hime either Shilo or Rudy."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags questioned by boss, work here, take a bite

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss, walking past Dilbert, says, "What the...?" The boss says, "You still work here?" Dilbert thinks, "That's gonna take a bite out of my productivity."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags flirting, cashier, phoney, customer service smile, required, looks like flirting, Wally

View Transcript

Transcript

A smiling female employee, handing Dilbert change, says, "Thank you. Have a nice day." Dilbert thinks, "She's flirting with me." Dilbert says to the woman, "Um... Would you like to go out on Saturday?" The woman, still smiling, says, "I wasn't flirting. This is my phony customer service smile." The woman says to Dilbert, "Employees are required to smile." Dilbert asks the woman, "Okay. But now you're flirting, aren't you?" The woman answers, "No, still phony." Walking away, Dilbert thinks, "Wally has to see this." Wally and Dilbert stand looking at the smiling woman. Wally says, "Hey, it looks like she's flirting with me!" Dilbert says, "Is this great or what?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags feminist freak out, hin, hiney, tall the hun, behind back, harsh, slave driver, ruthless, alice

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, reaching for a paper that Alice is handing him, says, "Thanks, Hun." Alice exclaims, "Hon?!" Alice says to The Boss, "You sexist %!*%! I will burn your village and make slaves of your children!" The Boss says to Alice, "It's short for Attila the Hun. Everyone calls you that." Alice says, "That seems harsh."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the succession plan, leader, multi viatmin, safe now, mixed blessing

View Transcript

Transcript

Noriko watches as The Boss gestures toward Wally and says, "If anything happens to me, Wally will be your leader." Wally thinks, "?" Reaching for her purse, Noriko exclaims to The Boss, "I have a multi-vitamin! Quick, take it!" Noriko listens to The Boss' pulse with a stethoscope while Dilbert massages The Boss' shoulders. The Boss holds a glass of water. Noriko says, "We're safe for now." Wally says, "This turned out to be a mixed blessing."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags can't lift arms, employees work harder, motivated, uncomfortable clothes, casual dress days

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert says to Wally, "There will be no more Casual Dress Days." Catbert says to Wally, "We believe that employees work harder when they are wearing uncomfortable clothes." Dilbert is wearing a spacesuit. Wally, sitting in front of a computer and wearing a suit of armor, says to Dilbert, "I feel all motivated but I can't lift my arms."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags birthday, mothers birthday, warp up present, an hour later, throwing towel, element of suprise, no waste paper, cookies

View Transcript

Transcript

In the kitchen, Dilbert says to his mother, "I've been thinking about your birthday, Mom." His mother says, "How sweet." Dilbert says to his mother, "It seems so inefficient to wrap up your present." As they carry milk and cookies out of the kitchen, Dilbert says to his mother, "You'll just rip up the wrapping paper an hour later." As his mother sets the cookies down, Dilbert says to her, "So I was thinking of throwing a towel over it instead." Dilbert says to his mother, "You'd get all of the element of surprise without wasting paper." Dilbert says to his mother, "Maybe I can use one of your towels so I don't have to lug one from my house." Dilbert's mom says, "Of course, dear. I wouldn't want you to lug a big heavy towel just for me." Dilbert reaches for a cookie and says, "Good. It's settled." His mother says to him, "Those aren't for you."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags avoid work, faking coma, punch repeatedly, get alice, right or left handed

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally waves his hand in front of The Boss' blankly staring eyes and says to Dilbert, "He might be faking a coma to avoid work." Wally says to Dilbert, "The only way to find out is to punch him repeatedly." Dilbert says, "Maybe we should get Alice." Wally, bunching his fists, asks, "Do you remember if I'm right- or left-handed?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags battery technology, question motives, transformation, lying, avoid work, manual labor

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to a female co-worker, "No known battery technology can handle this load and be this size." The female co-worker folds her arms as Dilbert says, "That's not what you wanted to hear." The female co-worker grimaces as Dilbert says, "So your mind will erase what I said..." Dilbert continues, "... And replace the memory with something totally ridiculous so you can question my motives." The female co-worker grunts, "Gaah!" Dilbert thinks, "The transformation is complete." The female co-worker exclaims, "How can you say there's no such thing as a battery?!" The female co-worker berates Dilbert, "You're lying to avoid work! I'm going to talk to your boss!" Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Lately, the only thing keeping me from being a serial killer is my distaste for manual labor." Dogbert says, "You're preaching to the choir."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags motivation fairy, magic wand, enjoy working, utter futility, wally myth, spell, cast

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally is sitting at his computer. A small winged person, hovering in the air behind him, says, "Hello, employee. I'm the Motivation Fairy." Wally sits up and listens as the Fairy says, "My magic wand will make you enjoy working despite the utter futility." Wally turns to the Fairy and says, "Knock yourself out." The Fairy replies, "Wally?! Gaa! I thought you were a myth!"