Face Front Comic Strips - Page 68
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721 Results for Face Front
View 671 - 680 results for face front comic strips. Discover the best "Face Front" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday September 04,
2020
Compared To Alice
Tags business, comparision, face mask, good, office workers, punish, sarcasm, selfish, tragic, work
Transcript
alice: you did great work on this...which has the tragic effect of making my work look less good in comparison. dilbert: will you be punishing me for my good work? alice: yes, but think of it as you not being selfish.
Saturday September 05,
2020
Lifetime Of Being Wrong
Tags business, office workers, wrong, decision, career, assess, life, sarcasm, face mask
Transcript
dilbert: i think you're wrong. co-worker: what error did i make? dilbert: i'm basing my decision on your entire career of being wrong about everything. i hope i'm not the first person to point that out. co-worker: give a minute to reassess my entire life.
Sunday September 06,
2020
Authority On Your Opinion
Tags business, office workers, disagreements, Opinion, sarcasm, change, debate, authority, hallucinating, lying, stupid, gaslight, insult, face mask
Transcript
co-worker: why have you changed your opinion since last week? dilbert: i haven't changed my opinion. co-worker: no, it was different last week. dilbert: are we really debating which one of us is a better authority on my opinion? co-worker: you might be lying about not changing your opinion. dilbert: and you might be hallucinating or lying or just stupid. co-worker: you might be trying to gaslight me right now. i'm glad we can have these honest talks. dilbert: i hope you plunge to your death in a freak elevator accident.
Monday September 07,
2020
Reasonable Doubt
Tags managers & supervisors, office workers, employees, health, leader, coronavirus, indoor, face mask, kill, doubt, sarcasm
Transcript
Carol: that stupid coronavirus is no match for a healthy, young leader such as yourself. freedom demands that you go to crowded indoor places without wearing your mask. boss: are you trying to kill me? carol: i'd say there's reasonable doubt.
Tuesday September 08,
2020
Management Got Virus
Tags business, health, management, coronavirus, quarantined, work, wisdom, idiot, theme, face mask, sarcasm
Transcript
catbert: the entire management team has contracted coronavirus and is quarantined. they asked me to tell you to stop working, because without their wisdom, you idiots will ruin everything. any questions? dilbert: no, i think you covered the main themes.
Wednesday September 09,
2020
Spreading Virus
Tags coronavirus, covid-19, business, health, spread, face mask, happiness, immune system, medical, Advice, doctor, manage
Transcript
dogbert: they say the best way to manage the coronavirus is to spread it to people you dislike. the happiness you get from that will boost your immune system. dilbert: maybe i'll get medical advice from an actual doctor. dogbert: they leave out the good stuff.
Thursday September 10,
2020
Artificial Dumbness
Tags business, cell phone, managers & supervisors, technology, software, invention, artificial, dumb, human, face mask
Transcript
dilbert: my new software invention is called "artificial dumbness." it acts dumb so humans will think they are talking to one of their own. boss: that couldn't possibly work. dilbert's phone echos: that couldn't possibly work.
Saturday September 12,
2020
Augmented Reality
Tags office workers, business, introduction, reality, glasses, social media, history, impressions, dumb, face mask
Transcript
girl: my name is ... dilbert: stop right there. my augmented reality glasses are showing me your entire social media history. girl: i hope it makes a good first impression. dilbert yelling: my god, you are dumb!
Sunday September 13,
2020
Applying Math To Guesses
Tags business ethics, managers & supervisors, employment, business, analysis, discount rate, installation, maintenance, project, technology, math, guess, sarcasm, face mask
Transcript
boss: how confident are you in your analysis? dilbert: very confident. boss: good. dilbert: unless i used the wrong discount rate, which is hard to know. boss: but otherwise, it's solid? dilbert: except for the installation and maintenance costs, which are wild guesses. and we don't know if we sized the project right, so costs could be double or triple. boss: it sounds as if you applied math to a bunch of wild guesses. dilbert: yes, but i got the result you wanted. boss: next time, just say that.
Monday September 14,
2020
Survivor Guilt
Tags coronavirus, managers & supervisors, business, double, income, pandemic, covid, survivor guilt, sympathy, face mask
Transcript
ceo: well, i personally doubled my income during the pandemic. now i have a bad case of survivor guilt. dilbert: do you expect to get much sympathy for that? ceo: i won't know until i try.


