Actually A Woman Comic Strips - Page 68

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View 671 - 680 results for actually a woman comic strips. Discover the best "Actually A Woman" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dinosaurs, #babysitter, #frankly, #bob, #eating, #children parents

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A man says to his wife, ". . . We should at least interview him. Nobody else even answered our ad for a babysitter." The woman says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Frankly, Bob, we're concerned that you might try to eat the children." Bob replies, "Well, of course, in that case there would be no charge for the evening." The husband says, "He's more than fair."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #invitation, #bother, #courtesy, #hosts, #blitter

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Dilbert and Dogbert stand in the hallway of a couple's house. The man says, "We're so glad you guys could stop by." Dilbert replies, "Thanks for inviting us." Dogbert thinks, "We hardly know them." The woman says, "I'd offer you some coffee, but that would be a bother." Dilbert says, "Uh . . . None for me. Thanks." The woman says, "I noticed you didn't bring any food as a courtesy to your hosts. I guess we'll eat when you leave." The man says, "We usually watch television now, but I'll try not to appear bitter about your visit." The man and woman sit in chairs while Dilbert and Dogbert sit on the floor. The man asks, "Why haven't we done this sooner?" Dogbert replies, "We thought you were scum."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #prudish, #stupid, #hairball, #wimp, #class, #blessing

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Dilbert and a woman sit on the couch. The woman asks, "Would you like to hold hands?" Dilbert replies, "We'd better not . . . My dog is around here someplace." The woman asks, "What's your dog got to do with anything?" Dilbert replies, "He's a bit prudish. He won't allow it in his house." The woman replies, "HIS house? Ha ha ha! He's YOUR dog! YOU're the master!" The woman continues laughing and says, "Your dog is just a stupid hairball! And you must be a first-class wimp!" She laughs. Dogbert pulls a hose through the window and stands next to the couch holding the nozzle. Dilbert says to him, "With my blessings."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #geraldo, #cult, #television, #live television, #Dogbert, #talking

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Geraldo Rivera holds a microphone and says, "Today on 'Geraldo' our entire show is about a dog who started his own cult!" Dogbert says into the microphone, "Actually, Geraldo, I don't know what you're talking about." Geraldo faces the camera and smiles. Dogbert says, "I love live television."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob, #dawn, #dogberts, #security, #neutralize, #motives, #accident, #dinosaurs, #cult

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The caption says, "Bob and Dawn join Dogbert's cult." Dogbert says to Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs, "You two are in charge of security." Dogbert continues, "Your job is to neutralize anybody who questions my motives." Dawn says, "Actually, we have some questions of our own . . ." Dawn asks, "Or should we just neutralize ourselves?" Dogbert replies, "Make it look like an accident."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #cult, #several, #spiritual, #leaders, #already, #demonstrates, #complete, #absence, #indpendent, #chant

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A woman sits on the floor across from Dogbert's desk. The woman says, "I'm hoping you will accept me in the Dogbert Cult." Dogbert says, "You do have a strong resume . . ." Dogbert continues, "Looks like you've been fleeced by several spiritual leaders already." The woman says, "I think that demonstrates a complete absence of independent thought." Dogbert asks, "Can you chant?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #monogamy, #field, #shuttle, #Dogbert, #rides, #uno, #love, #Advice

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I'm just a one-woman kind of guy." Dilbert continues, "Some guys like to play the field. Not me. I'm happy with just one woman." Dilbert continues, "Just one. Uno. That's best for me." Dogbert says, "You can take her for rides in the Space Shuttle you'll never have either."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #witchcrat, #handy, #annoying, #luv, #frog, #fly, #dinner, #date, #love, #Women

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Dilbert and a woman sit at a restaurant table eating dinner. Dilbert asks, "So . . . Uh . . . Why did you decide to take up witchcraft?" The woman replies, "It comes in handy." The woman points to a fly circling the table and says, "For example, suppose I want to get rid of this annoying fly here." The woman turns Dilbert into a frog and says, "Now be a luv . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #witch, #practicing, #awful, #lawn ornaments, #tacky, #lawn

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Dilbert sits at a restaurant table with a woman. The woman says, "Thanks for asking me out. Most guys get scared when they find out I'm a practicing witch." The woman continues, "Then they say something I don't like and I end up turning them into lawn ornaments." Dilbert replies, "That's awful!" The woman says, "Tell me about it . . . you can't believe how tacky my lawn is now."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #dinner, #love, #witch, #break the ice, #small talk, #witchcraft

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Dilbert walks next to a woman and thinks, "I can't believe she agreed to have dinner with me." In the restaurant, Dilbert pulls out the woman's chair and thinks, "I'm afraid to say anything to spoil this moment . . ." Dilbert thinks, "I guess I should say something to break the ice." The woman asks, "Did I mention that I'm a witch?"