Technology Comic Strips - Page 68
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803 Results for Technology
View 671 - 680 results for technology comic strips. Discover the best "Technology" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday July 11,
2001
Tags mother could use, moron, mother fed boss, Dilbert, desk, computer, together, bug in computer, technology
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his computer as the Boss sits behind him saying, "It needs to be so easy that your mother could use it." Dilbert replies, "My mother isn't a moron. Maybe we could use your mother as the test." The Boss asks, "What makes you think my mother is a moron?" Dilbert says, "She fed you."
Thursday May 31,
2001
Tags mobile tech platform, own wheelbarrow, lost lung
Transcript
The Boss walks out of his office with his giant gadget and says, "Carol, order an extra battery for my mobile technology platform." Carol replies, "Do you want the one that straps to your back or the one with its own wheelbarrow?" The Boss is seen sweating, carrying a huge, heavy black thing on this back, and thinking, "I think I just lost a lung."
Wednesday May 02,
2001
Tags thirty million dollars, nigerina, banker, bank information, email, ten percent commission, tube sock, fell behind dryer, ratbert, typing, computer, answering scam, technology
Transcript
Ratbert approaches Dogbrt holding a letter. Ratbert says, "A Nigerian banker needs my help getting thirty million dollars out of his country!" Ratbert continues, "All I need to do is give him my bank information by e-mail and I'll get a ten percent commission." Ratbert is seen typing: "Dear Gustava, my bank is a tube sock that fell behind the dryer."
Tuesday February 13,
2001
Tags boss, sneaking up on, computer, walk past, muscles cramping, technology
Transcript
The Boss peeks in at Dilbert in his cubicle and thinks, "Is that work? I can't see what's on the screen." The Boss raises one leg as if in the middle of walking and thinks, "If he sees me I'll pretend I'm in mid-stride, just passing by." Wally stands behind The Boss and says into his cell phone, "The small font is working." Dilbert says into his telephone, "Good." The Boss grimaces and thinks, "Muscles cramping."
Sunday February 04,
2001
Tags advertise, dogberts, magazine, piece of junk, stand on head, subscribe, ten page ad, totally objective review, technology magazine
Transcript
Dogbert says to The Boss, "I'm a reporter for 'Dogbert's Technology Magazine'." Dogbert says to The Boss, "I'm writing a totally objective review of your newest product." Dogbert says to The Boss, "First question: Will you advertise in my magazine or is your new product a piece of junk?" The Boss says, "Um... We'll advertise." Dogbert continues, "Will it be a multi-page ad or is your new product a piece of junk?" The Boss says, "It'll be a ten-page ad!" Dogbert says to The Boss, "Can you stand on your head for an hour or is your new product a piece of junk?" As The Boss stands on his head, Dogbert says, "Would you like to subscribe to my magazine? It's ten pages of ads."
Wednesday January 31,
2001
Tags outsourced sales, elbonian company, complex technology, bad string, call back, mud pile
Transcript
The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "We outsourced our sales and fulfillment functions to an Elbonian company." Wally looks at Dilbert as Dilbert asks, "Um... Are you sure that's the best way to sell complex technology?" Three Elbonians and a pig each are holding a tin can with string to their ears. One Elbonian says, "Could you call back? We have a bad string."
Sunday January 07,
2001
Tags battery technology, question motives, transformation, lying, avoid work, manual labor
Transcript
Dilbert says to a female co-worker, "No known battery technology can handle this load and be this size." The female co-worker folds her arms as Dilbert says, "That's not what you wanted to hear." The female co-worker grimaces as Dilbert says, "So your mind will erase what I said..." Dilbert continues, "... And replace the memory with something totally ridiculous so you can question my motives." The female co-worker grunts, "Gaah!" Dilbert thinks, "The transformation is complete." The female co-worker exclaims, "How can you say there's no such thing as a battery?!" The female co-worker berates Dilbert, "You're lying to avoid work! I'm going to talk to your boss!" Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Lately, the only thing keeping me from being a serial killer is my distaste for manual labor." Dogbert says, "You're preaching to the choir."
Monday November 13,
2000
Tags gigantic database, customer behavior, information, non linear math, data mining technology, optimize retail channels, spam, meeting here
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "We have a gigantic database full of customer behavior information." Dilbert says, "Excellent. We can use non-linear math and data mining technology to optimize our retail channels!" The Boss says to Dilbert, "If that's the same thing as spam, we're having a good meeting here."
Tuesday November 07,
2000
Tags boring, director of information, e-diot, easy way, title
Transcript
Wally says to The Boss, "You should put an 'E-' in front of your title." Wally says, "It's too boring just being the Director of Information, Operations and Technology." The Boss says to his secretary, Carol, "From now on, call me the E-DIOT." Carol says, "If only there were an easy way to remember that."
Thursday October 26,
2000
Tags internet, personal rasons, whole world, knowledge, entertainmemt, finger tips, ice cream, so hungry, eating in cubicle, technology
Transcript
Dilbert, sitting at his computer, thinks, "I..must..resist..using..the internet for personal reasons." Dilbert thinks, "Gaa! There's a whole world of knowledge and entertainment at my fingertips...teasing me!" Catbert dangles an ice-cream cone from a pole in front of Dilbert. Dilbert says, "Ice Cream! I'm so hungry!" Catbert says, "No eating in your cubicle."

